A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Right , I've known this guy for a few months, and I don't know what to do.we have met up and we have had sex a few times, he treats me well etc, but I don't know where I stand with him. He is been showing me potential women his mum wants to marry but my response has always been go and speak to them etc as I don't want to get hurt. Should I bring up the conversation with him or keep things how they are? I don't understand does he want sex, commitment or just wants to make me jealous ?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (11 May 2014):
 If after a few months you don't know where you stand with him.... that also means you know where you do NOT stand with him : you are not in a serious committed relationship. If you were, you knew, you'd have no possible doubts. So, is it what you want, a serious exclusive relationship ? Then yes, you need to bring it up, speak out so that you do not waste your time (... if he comes up with some cliche' like " I like what we have right now ".. or " I don't want to put a label on is "... That means NO, we are not / not going to be boyfriend and girlfriend ).
ASK for what you want, is that simple. The answer is either yes , or no. If it's yes, great- if it's no- at least you know were you stand and are not going to be misled .
As for pointing out to you his future brides , I don't know for sure, as for me I would not be impressed- he may just be joking , or tryng to make you jealous, but it's a bad joke, because it's like implying that you are not the marrying kind or a girl to bring home to mom. I don't think it's the type of thing a man in love would joke about.
Also, keep in mind that this is a matter that has got to do with ethicity. As you are certainly aware, there are in UK immigrant cultures which practice , routinely and normally, arranged marriages- and if your guy belongs to one of those, he might have been much more literal than you think.
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