A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Good day dear friends, my story is fresh and happened on a very short time frame. I met this guy in a business meeting 2 years back we spoke briefly during the meeting and I have never seen him again till my boss asked me to call him a week ago and set a meeting with him. As planned I went and met him last thursday and exchanged numbers. The minute I walked into his office my heart raced. I felt an incredible connection and chemistry. He's the shy composed calm type . I got a text from him the minute I left thanking me for stopping by and asking for my blackberry pin. We chatted it from thursday till monday non stop and we met on monday for coffee , he told me about his divorce 5 years back and that he's single etccc we kept texting each other all of yesterday and he even said that he misses me when he doesn't hear from me on blackberry messenger. When I asked him about his personality he said that he hates liars and he's a black or white kinda man! I told him that I'm calm and hate liars too and hate night clubs. Then we were exchaging pics and I sent him one of me in a lounge dancing, he instantly texted back asking if it was in a night club with an emoticon of raised eyebrows, I laughed and lied saying that it was my birthday, he knows that my birthday is in september and the pic has a date taken in october, I donno why I lied I usually never or rarely do but I was scared he might think that I'm a liar that I actually lied. Ever since yesterday he changed drastically!!!! He got cold and I'm pretending as if I'm not noticing. Today nothing from his side and I texted him 5 hours ago he ignored. What do you think dear friends?
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divorce, exchanged numbers, liar, my boss, shy, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2011): Wow! He turned out to be a loser. Good to know. Even so Chica, you now look like the Kick Ass Person in that you owned up to your actions and you were given the gift to discover - he so wasn't worth your time.
He hates Liars. He must really hate himself. ;)
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your sincere advice I shouldn't have lied and I learned my lesson. I called him yesterday to apologize and a woman answered his cell then hung up instantly. I tried him again the phone was off. Few hours later I received a call from a strange number and a girl asking how do I know the guy and that she's his fiance. I heard his voice in the background telling her to give him the phone. What a drama! Glad It came too soon. Thanks again dear friends for your advices. f
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2011): Hes the non serious type with you because you disrespected him by lying to him. When someone lies to another, you hurt the trust, even if its a newfound friendship that could have grown into a romance.
I take it you took the cowards route and pretended like nothing happended? Which is still a lie.
Which would totally have him being cool, reserved, distant with you and has put you into the 'bud to text from time to time' arena and not a 'woman I want to date seriously' arena.
I'd give up on the hope you still have a fighting chance.
Or since you are an adult, ask his forgiveness and see if that changes his attitude.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your replies! I shouldn't have lied and I definitely not a party animal and I hate clubs a lot. That pic was taken in a lounge and I was sooo afraid to tell him cause he doesn't know me yet. Lesson definitely learnt. He did reply today and he was soooo nice to me but again gooot cold and stopped replying to the 3rd message. So I'm guessing he might be the non serious type.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for ur replies! I shouldn't have lied and I definitely not a party animal and I hate clubs a lot. That pic was taken in a lounge and I was sooo afraid to tell him cause he doesn't know me yet. Lesson definitely learnt. He did reply today and he was soooo nice to me but again gooot cold and stopped replying to the 3rd message. So I'm guessing he might be the non serious type.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 November 2011):
 He told you straight out that he has no time for liars yet you still chose to lie about something so small and silly. At the end of the day even if the picture was taking in a night club and you told him you didn't like nightclubs it doesn't mean that you have never been to one. You have lied to him early on, he has caught you out and now he is being off with you because he already told you that he hates liars. Be honest with him and tell him the truth, apologise for lying and tell him why you done it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2011): You pooched it by lying. That's totally what I think. He's of an age and of a standard where he does not have time for games, BS, and drama and lying invites all that garbage in.He probably ended things with his Wife due to extramarital affair on Wife's side so thus the "he hates liars."He told you he was a black/white guy. He set his standards and expectations clearly.You said you hate nightclubs- so probably not the truth but one said to entertain him and get him hooked- but it was a lie and that one spun into the next one.Do you really hate nightclubs? Or did you say that to impress him?If he doesn't want a party girl and you see yourself as one- should have just be forthright in the first place.I'd say he was offended by you lying to him and yah, he's cold and turned off big time.I would come clean either way. I'd say I can often be an insecure woman and do dumb and lie and I knew full well I did and understand you are disappointed and angry at me.The photo is of me in a nightclub. I don't hate them. (Do you frequent them often?) And I am sorry I lied to you.At least you can be adult and own up. The more you stop lying and the more you admit to lying- the easier it becomes to actually be a person who does little to no lying.Integrity is EVERYTHING.Lesson Learnt.
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