A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i'm not a confident girl at all.i just want your advice about something.i just want to know how i could possably get a particular guy to want to talk to me.something that would get him to say something first.i don't want me or him to feel uncomfortable.i am embarassed to be around him for a reason that im not going to go in to.but i think that if i somehow would come across as that i'm ok with him now even though he really should have talked to me about what a person told me.i really want to find out if i still like him after all this time and if he ever had feelings for me because it's been driving me crazy.i don't want to just talk at him about if he liked me like, 'someone said you did,' then why didn't he do anything about it?To him i don't want to ask him anything like that at all.i just want him to talk to me about anything really it doesn't really matter about what.he's the only guy that i've felt butterflys for.that i have dreams telling me to talk to him.i just have no idea how i can.help please. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, MissVee  +, writes (20 February 2011):
I promise you that once you have that first conversation, you'll wonder what you were ever worried about!
In my experience, the best way to make a man approach you and start talking is to catch his eye and smile while he's near you. It's that simple. No ridiculous eye-lash battering required, no cheesy pick-up lines (think "so, do you come here often?") or hair twirling, just a simple smile. It doesn't even matter if you go red or absolutely melt inside. That's normal. That's what hot men do to us women. They're like flames and we're ice, we just turn to mush, so don't sweat it!
Why didn't he do something about it if he likes you? Well, there is a fallacy that is spread about by fashion mags and so on, so forth that states that men are brave and fearless all the time. It's just not true. Some men are anxious about approaching women. After all, nobody likes to be turned down, and men are human beings, like the rest of us!
I wouldn't place any stock in hearsay that others spread around. Women can be a nasty lot, we love nothing more than to cause trouble for other women... it's best to get to know this man yourself rather than to try to work out how his mind works by micro-examining every little thing he's said to every other person in your social network!
Really, seriously still stuck for a way to approach him? Get a friend to do the "set-up". Have her meet him and you somewhere, then get an emergency, "oh, gosh darn it, have to go, sorry guys!" call. Works like a charm as a last resort, but be warned: men woke up to this trick about the same time they learnt that women are capable of thought!
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