A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my ex split up about a month ago due to lots of arguing and personal issues - we needed space.Two weeks into the break up after no contact between us he tried to reach out to me by texting me asking how I was doing, and I politely told him I needed space, he was ok with that.Two more weeks of no contact passed, and last night I decided to text him. I said 'Hey, just thought I'd text and see how you doin :) x', he text back within about a minute and said 'Hey. Yeh im gud. I cnt rly text you, i have no texts left, sorry lol. I get sum on thursday so il txt u then. Hope your good x' and I replied back with 'Ok no worries. Hope you're well x'I know this is a really difficult question to answer, but do you think he sounded interested? I miss him so much, he's my first love, and I really want us to get back together because we only fell apart due to personal reasons (both my parents were in hospital and it was majorly stressing me out and I pushed him away).I want to play hard to get with him and play it cool (which is what I think he's trying to do now). I will wait and see if he texts me on Thursday; if he doesn't I won't get disheartened because No Contact enabled me to calm my emotions and sort my head out, but if he does end up texting how do I play it? What do I do? Do I tell him I want him back or what?
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female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (30 March 2010):
 It's hard to tell from the text he sent what he feels. Texts don't have the tone and emotion you get when you actually talk with someone.
I think if I were you, and I wanted him back, I'd let him know I was ready to talk, in person, or on the phone, not do it through texts, which can be misunderstood too easily.
Let him know you were majorly stressed and that you apologize for pushing him away. You hurt him by doing that and you'd like to try again, now a bit older and much much wiser. Be honest, try not to cry, and just be hopeful.
If there's something there and he's had a chance to miss you, you might wind up with another chance.
If you don't, and he's not interested, you will remember this lesson: when you're stressed, you push people away. How do you keep that from happening with the next boyfriend? How you figure out when it's happening and how do you prevent yourself from sabotaging the relationship?
Just be honest and open with him and don't bother playing the "hard to get" game right now. You pushed him away already, right? And that didn't work out so well with him.
If he texts you, text back, "I'd like to talk, not text, as I have something to say." Then when you talk to him, apologize for your behavior and just be honest. If he's angry with you for being treated badly, accept that you did treat him badly and let him talk through the issue. Don't argue the point or find something that he did wrong just to balance this. It's not fair to him and will be a bad habit for you to get into. Fess up your mistakes and learn from them.
Good luck.
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