A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok so a few quarters back I started liking this guy and he showed interest too, then i finally talked to him at the end of that quarter. I don't know if I went into it too fast and scared him off or whatever happened (might be because I'm 8yrs older than him)but I asked him to hangout and he just told me that it was because he didn't really know me, so I took it as a reject then summer came and i didn't see him. Now the new quarter started and I feel him giving me attention, like he would keep on staring at me or try to stare into my eyes and hold the gaze. Also feel that he's trying to be around me, most of the time now when he sits he is always turned towards me and looks as if he's about to say something but he doesn't. He is with his friends all the time, and when they all leave the room, one or a couple of his friends will look back at me trying not to be obvious and they will smile. When he is with a friend of his that is a girl, I see that he tries to not show much of attention towards them (well a few quarters back I've gotten jealous when he was with other girls and he saw it) his friends might like him but I feel he tries to not walk next to them or kind of distance himself or show they are just friends when he knows I'm there.Anyways I don't really know what to do because I feel he likes me but he doesn't come talk to me but thats probably partly my fault because I'm so shy so I probably seem "cool" and unapproachable, and plus I feel he kinda rejected me the last time, so I'm even more scared to go talk to him. I don't know what else to do I'm trying to smile more and possibly say hi to him or wave at him, but haven't gotten a good chance yet. One time I don't know if he tried to pretend to bump into me because I was walking out after buying something w/out looking and almost bumped into him, but it didn't happen and he just kept walking straight and didn't look back and his friend was following him along and looked back at me and was trying to say something to him but he kept on walking then I tried to walk another way so I wouldn't be following behind him then we saw each other again, he and his friend walked out the door his friend was kinda looking back at me again saying something to him and he was holding the door open for me but he didn't look back still.
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female
reader, Lola1  +, writes (8 October 2009):
 I don't know if he likes you, but this is how I would approach things.
1) He rejected you when you tried to approach him. It's up to HIM to make a move now.
2) You have already made yourself approachable. When you have the mentality that you will be approachable, you already give it off a welcoming vibe. Don’t overdo it, though. Unless a situation occurs naturally, do not feel too eager to wave and smile.
3) Behave as though you do not notice. He may work harder to gain your attention. "See through him" if he is looking at you for a few moments, sometimes (not always). It's his turn to work for your attention and his turn to make a move. If he “doesn’t appear to notice you,” then return the favour. Certainly do not notice that his friend is looking back at you.
For all you know, he told them you like him and that is why they are looking at you.
There is a chance that a lot of this is in your head. He may not notice you as much as you think. Some men may be shy, but they will often still make their feelings known.
Whether he likes you or not, at this point you can only leave any possible future in his hands.
Good luck
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