A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Yes, this is the same old story. I really like my guy friend tom. I think we would be great together, but i can't be sure because i don't know everything about him. I'd like the opportunity to find out. However, he has a girlfriend, Sam. Tom doesnt know that i like him. He and i are VERY friendly people naturally, so putting us together makes it seem like we are a couple. He's even put his arm around me and stuff. And not behind his g/fs back either, one time a bunch of us went shoppin and he had his arms around both of us. And if she were to ask about anything that happened b/t us i'd tell her the truth. So no secrets from her. Also whenever we are talking we make eye contact and sometimes just stare at each others eyes. A few of our friends have said they can see something happening between us, later. I obviously don't want to break them up but what i am concerned about is 1- if im just being used for attention (but he doesnt seem like that type of guy)2- if he likes me, but not enough3- is it possible that he likes me a little, but doesnt realize it yet? 4- if so, will he realize it?5- Am i kidding myself? if you need more details about how he is around me, ask. there is a LOT more i could say.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question"Are you sure that Toms girlfriend is comfortable with him putting his arm around you?"
I am assuming she is, considering she was right there and didnt say anything and didnt act weird or anything. Although one time, i remember we were at a party together and we sat next to each other and we made eye contact while we talked, and eventually just stopped talking and just stared for a minute.... eventually he asked his g/f if this (stared into my eyes) means anything. She said actually it means a lot. and she didnt seem thrilled. that was months ago. i dont see his girlfriend too much so i cant say for sure that it doesnt bother her. She does the same thing w/other guys though so it shouldnt
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (15 December 2008):
 If he has a girlfriend then I guess you are going to have to just settle on being friends and waiting until he decides he'd rather be with you instead of the current girlfriend. Meantime, I would still date other guys because putting your life on hold at your age is stupid, go have some fun.
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A
female
reader, SDJ  +, writes (15 December 2008):
 Maybe you could ask him out for dinner as a break from work or something and he could say to his girlfriend that it's 'work related' so there's no suspicions. Are you sure that Toms girlfriend is comfortable with him putting his arm around you.
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A
female
reader, Ravenxx91 +, writes (15 December 2008):
 Maybe he does actually want to be your friend and he is a naturally affectionate person. If he liked you back he would be worried of doign affectionate things with you in front of his gf.
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