A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi,im a 20 year old female and im rather confused at the moment...i seem to be highly attracted to "pretty boys" one in particular i went to primary school with. i moved towns when i was 11 and lost touch.however,recently around a year and a half ago i got back in touch with him and all was well... until he wanted to meet.i was working in a shop at the time and i had arranged to meet him in a club for the first time in years.i talk to him on msn all the time,and text him quite a bit too.i couldnt go meet him because there was a problem with my first wage and didnt get paid on time.ever since then he likes to call me a sell-out to wind me up.in april i briefley expressed an interest in joining a gym but i couldnt afford it as i had left work as i was made redundant.since then he kept asking me when was i joining, am i ever going to go with him to the gym, which i did... only to find i darednt speak much cos i was too shy!!i met him a few times after that,signing into the gym as a guest,and its defo got easier for me to talk to him,but i always break the eye contact!anyways the latest time weve been to the gym, we were talking in his car when he was driving me home and he mentioned this blond girl he liked in the gym and was winding me up saying that i should have been looking and all the rest of it, and i came out with "as if!" and he said "as if what?!" so i replied "your just mean!you like to pick on me for the sake of it!!" then there was a horrible pause before he said "and thats why you love me" so i was shocked and said "what!?" and he changed it to "and thats why you love me for it" and then i quickly said(not looking at him) "no i dont" then there was a dodgy silence before he changed the subject to the nail polish i was wearing...my question is does he fanct me and have i made it obvious that i like him??
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell the actual convo in his ka when he was driving me home kind of went like this....(i remember it pretty well cos i was embarrased!)
i was saying that i'd gone to the gym the saturday before for a good three or so hours by myself (not just in the gym,but also drinking soft drinks after with a few people i know from there in the bar) and he kept saying "no you didnt" and im there saying "yes i did" three or four times.
then he wanted to know what machines i went on so i told him,then i paused slightly,remembering what else i went on then he spoke about the blond girl saying "did you erm,see that blond girl on the running machine in front of you?"
and i said "what girl?" he replied "the one with the blond hair?she had it in the bobble and was running for like 30 minutes or something?!" and i said "yea..." and he goes "she was well hot wasnt she?!" and i said "i dont know i wasnt exactly checking her out!" so his response was "well you shouldda been looking,shouldnt ya?!" and i said "well no not really....as if!!" "as if what?!" (me looking incredulous at this point..as if he didnt know!) "as if what?!" he asks again,with me saying "your just mean!you just pick on me for the sake of it!" then there was quite possibly the longest minute ever before he said "and thats why you love me" then i said "what?!" cos i was just shocked by that comment and he quickly said "and thats why you love me for it" and thats when i replied "no i dont" then there was another pause before we started talking about how chipped my nail varnish was cos i couldnt find the nail varnish remover! lol please help!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2007): Since he seeked for your company, I dare say he does like you, or would have invited somebody else in your stead or been less persistent. Talking about the girl from the gym was... teasing, using this small strategy to follow your response, see if you're disturbed to know he's noticed other girls. A man can do this to have a better clue if the girl has feelings for them, especially when the girl is the reserved type... if she frowns at the idea even discreetly or gives signs of discomfort in her voice, guess what the reaction can tell him! I don't necessarily agree with the other post as I hardly see you in that posture, you're not the type. If he's brave enough to tease, chances are he's brave to make the first step as well. And we don't know about the boy's intentions eiher? Just, just don't deny invitations or act unavailable, that's a mustn't, because it can push him away, on the contrary you should invite him sometimes as well and don't let him carry all initiatives. But if he offers to carry your bag, say yes, if he wants to go to the cinema, say yes... as for more than that, calculate and be sure you "know" him. I'm just worried that anybody you don't know sufficiently well yet, and sees your lack of experience can take advantage, but don't be over-cautious either. He could be a good option. If he asks you if you like him... you could answer with the truth? That's how relationships get started. But of course as always we have to go to the wardrobe and take a bit of patience from the shelf, and a bit of staying in expectative as in "I hope he has best intentions" and a bit of "If it fails, there's always other opportunities. One link at a time." Best of luck, dear.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2007): Well, he said he liked another girl at the gym. How rude..are you sure you'd wanna be with a guy like that anyways?
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A
female
reader, Kay-lee. +, writes (22 September 2007):
 Hi,
Well, I think that you may have roused his suspicions, but I also think that he has quite a crush on you aswell.
See how the relationship goes and no matter how many times you've heard this, BE YOURSELF.
Good luck!
Kay-lee. x
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A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (22 September 2007):
 My advice to you is when you see him next, grab him and give him a big smooch. That way he won't have to use comments to get you to react. You're shy, you said you were being sort of hidden as to how you felt with him. When he's not getting a reaction by you, he makes comments that wind you up. Talking about a girl at a gym would only wind up someone who has feelings for him.
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A
female
reader, Cupcake  +, writes (22 September 2007):
 I think its pretty clear he likes you, he seems to be pretty persistant when it comes to spending time with you. However I dont think you have made it clear that you actually like him. Perhaps you should flirt with him more.. Instead of you saying "no i dont" you could have said "you wish i did", it still implys the same thing but shows him that your more intrested as your playing along with him. So start to show him you like him more, becuase it seems like hes interested in you!
Good Luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2007): No. This guy is not the one for you. Even before I read the part where he was talking about a girl at the gym, just reading how you couldn't go to the club because you didn't have money and how he wants you to join a gym when clearly it is out of your means, I was thinking what a jerk. He is so selfish towards you. I mean if he wants to take you out why can't he pay?? I don't see anything wrong with that. And he wants you to join a gym?? You can't afford it. Is he gonna pay for it?? He seems so insensitive to you. I feel like he is kind of pushing you around. A guy who really cares about you will go out of his way to show you a good time and not make you do all the work to be with him or keep up with him.
Look a guy who really likes you is not going to put you in a situation where you feel like you have to struggle to keep up with him and his lifestyle. A guy should never make you feel that way. Why can't he adjust to your lifestyle instead?? And if he would like you to join him in certain things that are beyond your means he absolutely should pay for it. It shouldn't have even crossed his mind not to. I think he is using you. And I think he gets some sort of thrill out of treating you this way.
But he sucks, believe me. You can do SOOOOO much better. This guy is treating so badly. It irritates me just reading this. I hope you can realise this yourself soon enough.
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