A
female
age
41-50,
*amohir
writes:My question to everybody here is, What do you think, the man that Loves you wants you to be beautiful, well dressed, shining or He doesn't care at all? Yes, i'm quite disturbed by this guy, he seems not to care of how i do look... I can go to him anyhow dressed, in any showing and he seems not to care at all... for ex. I'm planning to have my hair cut, for 2 weeks, since it looks disheveled and without any shape anymore, and i told him....My hairdresser appeared not to be here at the moment so i delayed... But that doesn't make difference... The point is when a man takes/or wants to take all of one's woman time, not caring about how she looks or whatever, is it the key answer possesion or love? I'm confused, i realy like the guys that let my time, that allow me to short my hair, that like and give time to me to rest and look beutiful, and this makes me annoyed and confused... I just asked to see what opinions are. Thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, samohir +, writes (31 August 2007):
samohir is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you for answering.Your conclusion is totally on place. I told him to go away, simply , that im a kind of person that takes great pleasure in dressing and looking good. Maybe sounds like superficial but it is important for me. It s just make me happy. He said you can dress however you want, i dont mind at all, i Like and Love you just the way u re, not the dress. But honestly, i must admmit i dont like guy that say such things,just i think if somebody real loves you he would like to look beutiful, for u firstly, and than for him. If he doesnt let me to ivest in me, and if definately dsent help me in it, than what the hell i m to do with him! I can find guy that likes me to look nice, and will support me in it in every way.. Appearance is somethimes very immportant for me, not always , i can be casual just walking around , but when i dress nice i would like to go on nice places and have nace evening. I can affort still that to myself, so i ll see his reaction. Thank you for answering , helped me a lot, i thought for second that im just smug , snobbish person, which im not nor a do want to be. Its just i like making myself beutiful, dressing nicely, it gives me certain pleasure and happines, like some other things for other people. Thats allThank you again If got any further suggestions or opinions, feel free to write .
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2007): You are totally right. You should not feel like you have no time to yourself. You need a haircut. You need time to groom yourself. Time to be by yourself, if you want. Whatever. No you shouldn't abandon yourself and he shouldn't want you to. Of course guys like you to look pretty and be taking good care of yourself in every way. We like that about guys too!
I don't think it is that he doesn't care how you look, but I do think it has more to do with him just being a bit possessive and needing too much of your time, even if it conflicts with your personal time. That is an issue because you need to take care of yourself. You have got stuff to do and a life of your own that you have to maintain. Don't negelct yourself. EVER. Just tell him, "I love you but I gotta go. I got stuff to do." If he has a problem with that, he is probably just going to end up tiring you out anyway with his neediness. But in the meantime, don't accept it. You got to put you first.
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A
female
reader, chrissy32789  +, writes (30 August 2007):
 I think it is a same way with a girl. If you love this man yes you care what he looks like or his apperance but you kind of keep it to yourself if you dont like the shirt he is wearing you dont usally say anything or if he shaved his head your not going to tell him you dont like it you deal with it because you love this guy and you shouldnt judge him about everything he does. Now you are saying your bf dont care if you cut your hair he dont care what you wear. thats a good man, because alot of guys will tell there gf oh wear your hair that way oh you cant wear that cause it makes you look trashie. so when you have a guy who dont care what you look like and he loves you then let it go because its better to have a man who loves you for you and not what you look like or have,
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