A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:my partner of 6yrs went on a night out for a big game so lot's of drink consumed and when the team won partying didnt stop.... he went to a female work colleagues house who lives in the opposite direction to our house with two others after a night club,(gay male and another female) I rang him at 6:30am and he did not answer my calls! he rang back at 7:10am to explain and say he was home now and wanted me to see that he was wearing his clothes, I had left for work he told me where he was and stayed, said nothing happened and it was a stupid of him to go back in the first place.... it's 1yr on and although in my heart I believe him i obviously do not because i panic when he goes out now.... am i stupid to be still with him ? my friends and family say 99.9% he was with this girl and the funny thing is she looks like me! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2009): Why do you think he is lying? I have several friends that are girls and havent slept with them (they have taste lol)
I know there is alot of cheating going on these days but that doesnt mean that everyone does it. I dont for a start.
Sadly though if you cant trust him them im afraid you might have to end it.
I feel you should take some time to think this over properly and make the decision that will be best for you in the long term.
Hope it works out
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2009): You are irrational. This womans look have absolutely NOTHING to do with this, which just shows how you focus has become (how to put this nicely) disturbed. There's no logic to why her looking like you should mean anything. Does she even look like you? I bet if you really think of it she's nothing like you, but you so badly want to see this and want this to be true, that everything is evidence to you!You have no proof that he actually did anything with this woman. In fact you have evidence of the contrary: his word. So he had a crazy night out where he didnt call you to tell you were he was. But he wasn't alone at this party with this woman! There were other people there too!It's been a year and you still can't get over it? If you have already judged him a cheater, why didn't you leave him in the first place? Maybe because back then you knew it would be silly to leave because of nothing. And a year later it is still silly to leave him over nothing. You might think he did something, but until he tells you so, it's all in your head.Learn to control your thoughts or leave him and stay single for the rest of your life, because cheaters don't always spend the night. Cheaters also bring their lovers to their homes in broad day light while you are at work, and you can never guard yourself from that. All you can do is trust your partner. And that trust must come from YOU, not him.
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A
female
reader, AskLadyJuJu  +, writes (27 October 2009):
 you cant not trust someone if you have no proof. if theres no proof then dont stress yourself out about it. life is too short to be worrying about guys and their actions. i would be aware though and if you have been with him for a year now after that i wouldnt dwell on it so much. remember if you keep panicking when he goes out your going to push him away because according to him he did nothing wrong to lose your trust for you to act like that. i would try talking to him about it and tell him how you feel and how you want to know the truth before you go on together any longer. if he still denies it then move on from the subject until the truth shines light one day. but dont wait for it either because it might of never happened.. goodluck
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