A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: HEYI broke up with b/f of a year approx 2 months ago, he wanted to stay friends, that didn't work out as i was hurting too much. So we ended up having cross words. We haven't spoken in 2 weeks and i am really missing him. I want to call him as I think once i am better we could be friends, just not right now.The thing is I am not so sure if he was just suggesting the whole friends thing as a way of easing his conscience and still looking like the good guy. He is someone that literally takes you at your word, and if you have cross words or say not to call then he wont. But last time we spoke I said that i couldn't believe that i was always having to call him, and he said that although he finished it he is really hurting too, and he can't handle it.Thing is, I feel if i call him - just even as a friendly hello it is me chasing him again.Should I just leave him be, and get on with my life? Does anyone think if i meant that much to him and it was meant to be, he would find a way back to me?PLEASE HELP.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAnonymous
What do you suggest I do though?He is adamant that he is not in love with me and only sees me as a friend,but I really dont think i'm kiddign myself I think his stupid male pride is getting in the way because of the probs in the bedroom.We started off being friends when we first split,but because i was so angry i kept niggling at hm and then we fell out,we havent spokent in 2 weeks,I did text him a couple of days ago just to say hi and he replied immediately,but dont know if he is just being nice.Where do i take it from here?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2008): I'm going to go against what I'm sure everyone else will say and that is if you love him, then it's worth fighting for. Call me crazy but if you have that burning sensation in your heart and you truly feel that there is something there.....go for it. There can be no set time on when he will turn around or change his mind but at least you will feel that you did everything to try getting him back.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi
No,he finished with me stating he wasnt in love with me,only sees me as a friend,but his actions before and just after tellme otherwise,he was having serious problems in the bedroom department and i think that is why he called it a day,but denies this,just dont know where to go from here as i think it is heartbreaking to throw it away if there is a chance.Any suggestions?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2008): Hi,
I'm kind of in the same situation so I know EXACTLY how you feel. I told my bf we needed space and then came back to him and he said he only wanted to be friends. He is so deeply hurt that I asked for space that he felt like I rejected him. He told me that we could possibly get together in the future but for right now he just wants to be friends.
I would tell him how you feel and if he will listen--there is a chance of rekindling what you have. I just keep looking at it as if he loved me the way he said he did, I wouldn't have to fight so hard to get him back. You should never have to beg someone to take you back-you're a strong woman and don't give him the satisfaction that you need him to survive. Make him feel that the only way you'll talk to him again is if he comes back begging YOU because of the way he treated you during this time.
Best of luck.
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A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (9 May 2008):
It's hard to say. It depends why you broke up. Did you end it? If so, and you think you made a mistake, worth getting back to him.
If you honestly know it isn't going to work, just stay put and don't call him for a while. Or even just text him and say you're thinking of him, you're hurting too, and does he think it's too early to be friends? What does he want to do?
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