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Do You think I should apologize?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Family, Friends, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 December 2015) 4 Answers - (Newest, 5 December 2015)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hi cupids. Since my break up with my immature 23 year old boyfriend(if he's worthy to be called such) in July. I have been happier than ever.

But we still kept in touch and talked almost everyday like best friends(i wanted that from the start but I guess he developed feelings).

One of the main reason I ended things with him was everytime we go out, he has the sense of security that I can always handle the bills.

I got tired of this and he's also too much of a boy for me.

Always wanting to cuddle like it's food or something and he doesnt have a job and his parents(bad parents) are overly protective of him and ask him to write down the address and phone number of where he goes.

He even has to lie to come visit me at his age. I am not allowed to visit because his parents are always around and he says he wants his good boy image preserved and am like oh but you can come to mine right.

So I happily ended things.

Though we talked everyday, he knows practically everything about me except my bank details and then we went back on why our relationship didn't work and I told him how I got tired of always being the one to take him out and pay for stuff and how lazy he is.

Then to my utmost suprise he said I should lend him 200 dollars to take me out. I was enraged, who does that?

I have never asked anyone for money in my life. I d rather forgo some benefits than be a debtor. I said no and said why can't he ask his 31 year old sister who still lives with his parents at home.

So one day while chatting he sent me a picture of a new phone he got and said his loving sister who is 31 and unmarried bought it for him.

I told him wow that your sister finally did something for you.

After a while I would call him on the new phone but he never picked so I did the math and realized he was hiding the phone from his dad, I was so irritated.

So his father decided to buy a phone for him and his sister told him since she bought him a phone, she was gonna take all the money from their dad for the phone.

I was enraged(tho none of my business) and I expressed my dissatisfaction.

He defended his sister saying she's managing herself, she doesn't have much.

I was like but you aren't working, she has a job, but you could ask me that isn't working too for 200 dollars, this money was just 200 dollars. And then he finally gave the money to his sister.

Then I decided to go in for the kill and told him so you can give your sister 200 dollars, wasn't it the same 200 dollars you asked of me, why didn't you ask your sister to lend you then take me out and you finally got the money and gave it to her.

I deleted and blocked him on everysocial media. A week to this incident he kept on telling me he is horny(why should his lazy ass get horny: an idle mins is truly the devils workshop) then he said he would love to take me out to see a movie on the condition that he comes to mine and cuddle and I am like what? I refused. So many things he does, he's even lazy to get a girl to sleep with.

Did I go to far because of how much I hate him and his family. Do You think I should apologize?

View related questions: best friend, debt, horny, immature, money

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (5 December 2015):

Honeypie agony auntYou don't need to "help" him heal. The guy probably doesn't even think he is doing anything offensive or negative.

It's not your job to "raise" him into a decent human being.

But yeah, in short, I don't see why you bother with this guy.

Don't waste such strong emotions on "hating" him and his family. Just let him go and move on. No need to keep all that negativity around.

As for the whole $200 business. I find it ridiculous. Asking a girl to borrow $200 to take her out is deranged. What kind of date costs $200? Giving his sister the $200 since she got him a phone *shrug* makes more sense.

He wants things (including a GF) he just doesn't want to put in any work. So your assessment of him being lazy is correct...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2015):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

@honeypie, wow, I wasn't expecting that comment. Well I would say not to sound sympathetic, he's a very weak person, we agreed to be in contact to help him heal. But I guess I was wrong.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2015):

I think you're soft for giving this idiot the time of day! Pfft! Why are you even having to ask this question? If you've blocked him etc how is he telling you he's horny etc?

Cut the crap, just remove him from your life for god sake. He's a child! A boy! He will never treat you right! He's a bum! Sorry to say that yes that's exactly what he is, a bum!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (5 December 2015):

Honeypie agony auntWhy are you still talking to this fool?

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