A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a bit of a problem and wondering if anyone can help. Im a 20 year old male in a gay relationship. Ive been with my boyfriend now for about 8 months. Two months into the relationship I noticed during sex that my anus hurt. Ever since then whenever I have sex, which is not very often due to the problem or have a number 2 I have pain or bleed. When I was younger I had an anal fissure and I think this pain could be the same thing. I dont have any lumps so Im presuming its not piles or anything like that. I tried bathing in warm water and eating plenty of fibre to see if it would heal and it did get better, but it keeps coming back especially if I have a hard poo. I put off going to the doctor as when I had the fissure when I was younger I didnt particularly like having doctors poking my bum every two weeks before I eventually had it operated, and now I'd have to tell my doctors that I'm gay which I dont particularly look forward to, however I am going to go this week as I miss having regular sex. Just wondering if anyone has any opinions on whether I'm right in thinking it sounds like a fissure. Sorry the post was so long Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Philostyle  +, writes (13 June 2007):
I had this problem when I was younger, though I didn't have surgery but was damn near surgery (or so said the emergency room doctor). It was really really rough time and I don't know how I would ever lived through the pain. So you have my empathy.
I've done tons of research on this topic and seen plenty of doctors, my best bet would be (of course) to see the doctor and be honest. If your doctor is not cool with your lifestyle then it should come out now and not later because what is the point in having the doctor in the first place if it is only going to hurt you in the long run? All that being said here is my take on the situation:
Having an anal fissure leaves the area around your anus where the tear was permanently prone to irritants/tear and hemorrhoids. Luckily for me I grew into being a top and have zero desire to be a bottom but if I was I know that you are suppose to use extra caution than if you were in a normal non-fissured state.
Good Luck
A
male
reader, Jubbaloo +, writes (28 May 2007):
 I'm bisexual, and have had a similar problem in the past with the pain, but not with the bleeding. If you know your doctor well and dont feel comfortable telling them. You could try your local pharmacist, or sex clinic, but following research of my own. I would urge you to get treatment SOON.
http://www.embarrassingproblems.co.uk/analbleeding.htm
This was the site i found you mihgt like to read
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A
female
reader, laurie-loo +, writes (28 May 2007):
 hmmm well i would advise you go and see your doctor, he will be seeing that sort of thing every day and wont mind your gay. he will come across these sort of problems on a daily basis and he wont mind at all that your gay. i would deffinetly go and see a doctor, whats better, being embarrased for the rest of your life and going sexless? or getting the problem sorted and having regular sex once again :) hope everything turns out ok.
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