A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Help! I am totally confused by a mans behaviour and I need to know what people think.I have known a guy for about 2 years now but hadn't seen him for the last year as I have had a boyfriend. Before my boyfriend, this man and I had a thing for eachother. He is my best friends brother and we all used to go out in groups or I'd be at her house and would cuddle up to him while we all watched TV together and we got on like a house on fire. One night, we slept together after a night out. shortly after this I met my boyfriend and hadn't seen the man since.My boyfriend and I hadn't been getting on recently when I bumped into the man again. We were both out having a few drinks. On this night the man told me he was devastated when he found out I had a boyfriend. I was quite tipsy so its all a bit hazy but I'm sure love was mentioned and also that he loved that I am always happy and he kept talking about the night we'd slept together. Then we wrote a few jokes to eachother online and I saw him again a week later. My stomach had butterflies all week.The 2nd time I saw him was in a group of other people. He caught hold of me to say that he'd heard my boyfriend and I were having problems and that I'm leaving him. I replied what difference does that make? He then said that it made all the difference.I then saw him again after a big fight with my boyfriend, I went to stay with my friend and he was there. We both stayed up until dawn talking about anything and everything. In this we both said we'd had a lot of hassle with relationships and that relationships cause problems and we both agreed with eachother on this. We cuddled all night and it was the best feeling I'd had in ages... since the last time I saw him anyway!Now this week my boyfriend and I have finished after the massive argument. I have heard nothing from the man and I have sent a text to him and heard nothing back. I have confided in my best friend about all of this as I think he was just saying these lovely things for the sake of it but she insists its not like him to talk about that type of thing and that me and him have something different and always have done. He has previously been known to play the field a bit but I don't know what to do next. Do I hang on and be patient? Do I give up and get on with things? The problem is that I am absolutely head over heels for him and I could see us really working as a couple some day.I just want peoples opinions on whether you think he was being genuine or not? Help! xx
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female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (22 March 2009):
 I think that some guys come across as VERY insincere because they are flighty and don't know what they want. There are plenty of insincere guys, but in this case it sounds like he isn't in touch with what he desires in a relationship.
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