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Do you think he meant he didn't want a relationship, or just not a relationship with ME?!

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Question - (17 August 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 17 August 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

i really like this boy, we met on the internet and chatted for six weeks and then he came home ( hes in the army) for a few weeks and told me he doesnt want a relationship, he says his ex hurt him really bad and that he wants to be on his own. but when we were chatting on the internet he said he wanted a girlfriend. when a boy says he doesnt want a relationship, does that mean he doesnt want a relationship with me or with anyone? he says he likes me but if he did he would want to be with me right? thanks x

View related questions: his ex, the internet

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2009):

It just sounds like he's not ready for relationship full stop. I doubt it would be anything personally to do with who you are.

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A female reader, QuirkLady United States +, writes (17 August 2009):

QuirkLady agony auntHe means he doesn't want a relationship with you. He likes you, but not enough to go for the brass ring.

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A female reader, k_c100 United Kingdom +, writes (17 August 2009):

k_c100 agony auntOne minute your chatting and he says he doesnt want a relationship, and the next he tells you he wants a girlfriend? Makes no sense to me!

Generally from my experience when a guy tells you he doesnt want a girlfriend it means literally that - I dont want a girlfriend therefore you will never be my girlfriend. He just isnt interested in you I'm afraid so move on!

One guy said that to me before - we had been flirting for ages and I thought it might be going somewhere. Then one night he tells me he wasnt looking for a girlfriend right now because he wanted to focus on his career etc. So I left it at that, and then a few weeks later he has met someone and is wanting to see where that goes. So it really does mean that he isnt interested - but when someone better comes along he will be. Its tough and pretty harsh but thats life! Men are idiots most of the time but it makes it easier to see when a good one comes along!

I hope this helps!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2009):

Hey,

It could mean that he wants a girlfriend but when actually faced with being in a relationship he may not want that.

My advice is to play it very cool, if you like this guy and want to be his girlfriend make sure he know that, then if he only wants you as a friend think carefully before you say that you are okay with that.

If you arent okay you guys may not be togeteher at all.

You deserve to be with someone who wants you though.

I hope this helps.

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