A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend asked me out wen I was 14..we have been dating for 4 yrs now although he is 12years older than I am and I lost my virginity to him.I love him but in our first year of dating I found out his supposed ex gf was pregnant for him..I was too attached and continued the relationship and he assured me that after her delivery their relationship would be strictly about their son and I agreed..recently she has been sending him love sms' and they have been having lng conversations of about 10mins almost everyday and after confronting him,he tld me dat he is not supposed to be blamed for someone elses feelings..I think he still keeps me because of sex and the little financial benefits he gains..ma family is against this relationship and I have noone to confide in..he yells a lot lately and indirectly compares me with his ex by expecting me to do things she does for him... like praying together..wat do I do now?do u think he loves me or do these signs suggest that they still have sex?pls reply me
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female
reader, Kindpigeonette  +, writes (12 February 2013):
Leave before YOU get pregnant. I've lived in many countries, and there is a reason you are mentioning the age difference. You are still far too young to be in a serious relationship of 4 years, much less being cheated on! You already said he uses you for your money and verbally abuses you. I promise you that life will be much better without it. At first, even though he is a bad person, you may feel sad. That is normal, but does not mean you are better with him. You are better without him. Go back to your family! There is a reason they don't like him.
A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (11 February 2013):
He may love you but he's probably cheating and he's DEFINITELY taking advantage of you.
Not all cultures frown upon age differences like you have here, but whether they do or not, the reality is that it's easy for a man who's so nearly twice your age to take advantage of you.
I'd recommend listening to your family and leaving him. I'm sure you'll be happier. Yes, it'll be hard, but if you don't do it at some point then you'll be in for a lifetime of emotional pain. If you break up with him now the pain will soon be over.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2013): This is sickening. I am a big advocate for romantic relationships working out, but this is a little too far! I don't know why a 27 year old would sleep with a 15 year old, but come on! If the girl he got pregnant is closer to his age then he is probably still emotionally involved with her (if not physically). I would leave him.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 February 2013):
 I do not think he loves you honey.
I do not know if he's still involved with his ex or not.... as having young children with someone often requires a lot of contact.
He is correct, he can't be blamed for someone else's feelings but he can be blamed if he encourages those feelings or does nothing to discourage them.
In order to know why he keeps you, stop giving him money, stop doing things for him and stop having sex with him.
IF he yells it's bad
if he compares you to his ex and you are being told you are not as good as she is/was, I'd leave....
and be aware if you were 14 and he was 26 when you started that there is something wrong with him and his maturity level that he would find the company of a 14 year old child acceptable as an adult.
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