A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Do you always kiss goodbye? A simple peck?My boyfriend and I go on dates a lot. Some times we would part with a steamy session but some times, I would lean in but he doesn't make any move so I just back away. It kinna left me feel empty, even if the day was nice. What does his action mean? Or Am I over thinking his action? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2011): My boyfriend gets weird about me always wanting to say "I love you" before we hang up the phone. He thinks it makes it routine, I want t make sure they're the last words he hears from me, just in case. (Yes I'm paranoid...)
I explained this to him, told him how important it was to me, and I think my paranoia actually made him a little mushy, because he says it first now much of the time. It never hurts to talk. Just say "I don't want to sound needy, but this is something I want to give to you." How can he refuse it? It sounds like he's into you, so whatever you do try not to worry too much!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2011): I have to point out that in the scenario you described, he's not doing any action, so I'm not sure how to analyze his lack of behavior.
You on the other hand, make an intention to kiss him and then don't follow through. I would think he might be wondering why you don't go ahead a kiss him. I suspect it might trouble the average guy and make him less likely to engage in it because it appears you don't want to. After all, if someone made a move to kiss you and then appeared to change their mind at the last minute, wouldn't you feel a little rejected?
You don't have to talk about it with him, you just have to kiss him. Some people just express their affection in different physical ways. He's tends to be grabby and kisses happen to be very important to you. There's no shame in that so you don't have to be shy, but don't expect him to read your mind...and potentially hurt his feelings in the process.
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male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (10 May 2011):
 Then I don't think that there is any issue of him not wanting to be affectionate and not caring about you. You could just mention it to him instead of making a formal talk about it. Chances are he doesn't even notice and will want to make you happy. Also you could try making it really obvious, say by leaning in really close. Other than that I think mentioning something to him isn't being needy, he will probably be happy you told him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTalking to him about it, makes me feel like i'm ... needy...?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe's very affectionate...with his hands. When we're in public he would be very close and touchy/feely. We kiss a lot. It's because out of ten time, I would lean in to kiss him 7 times already. I just don't want to be the only one to start it. I feel like goodbye kisses are important too. ...argh...i'm just confuse.
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A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (10 May 2011):
I think you may be over thinking this. I heard this once from a movie saying that the first kiss is really magic but the routine ones are, well, routine. He may just not want to kiss because he feels he has to. Is he affectionate in other ways and does he kiss you at other times? Also there is no reason why you have to wait for him to kiss you. I love it when my gf leans in and kisses me.
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