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Do women really enjoy anal sex?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 August 2013) 13 Answers - (Newest, 10 August 2013)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I had a fairly normal but boing sex life with my now divorced wife. I met a nice woman and have been dating her for 6 months. We had our first sex about 2 months into the relationship. She is quite adventurous sexually, way more than my x wife who was my only other lover. Recently during a steamy sexual session she wanted anal sex. I never did this and my x wife never asked me or wanted anal sex. Well I gave her anal sex and she said she loves it. She told me that she prefers anal sex over vaginal sex and enjoys it more. I was very surprised about this, I never looked at her thinking she had this kind of sexual appetite, and it's obviously not her first anal experience. A question for you ladies, do you really get off on anal sex or is it just a kinky dirty sexual thing that turns you on and get's you off ?

I don't mind doing it for her if she enjoys it, I'm just wondering if she's bringing out the kink to keep me interested, which she has no need to worry about or if in fact a woman would really enjoy this and can orgasm from anal sex. I had a very boring unfulfilling and inexperienced sex life until I met this woman, I'm kind of shy to ask her about it because I don't want to sound like I'm some kind of prudish guy. I never had sexual experiences with anyone other than my x wife who was really a poor lover from what I'm experiencing now.

View related questions: anal sex, divorce, orgasm, sex life, shy, vagina

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A female reader, Atsweet1 United States +, writes (10 August 2013):

Atsweet1 agony auntWith the right tool and lover its great. I was married in the past to a not so great lover uncaring way to rough and hard just wasnt a good or great lover. Some people are not compatiable sexually the oral wasnt good either he didnt listen to me and wanted to be all satisfied but I couldnt be treated good and be may to feel good he didnt try I think he enjoys men more than women and he doesn't like his mother so it showed on me.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2013):

The previous anonymous responder has gravely misunderstood the statistic he quotes (if it is accurate). If 10% of women claim on confidential surveys that they enjoy anal sex, then the probability that a randomly selected woman off the street enjoys anal sex is probably in the 10% ballpark. However, the OP's girlfriend has repeatedly told him that she enjoys anal sex, so the probability that she does, in fact, enjoy anal sex is _much_ higher than the 10% population average.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2013):

According to the statistics, about 10% of women claim that they enjoy penetrative anal sex. So, to answer your question, I'd say there is a 10% probability that she actually enjoys it, and 90% probability that she is trying to please you.

Either way, if she is happy to give it to you, just go ahead and take it. Don't make her feel rejected or unwanted.

My wife used to initiate anal sex (mostly to please me) but I hesitated to take the offer, or felt bad afterwards. One day she got mad and and told me it wouldn't be worth the effort if I didn't take the offer happily. She had a point.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2013):

As a woman who enjoys sex, i love love anal sex always did and orgasm from it albeit its not a go to all the time i do enjoy it, some women love it some hate it some are indifferent its like anything else some people like vanilla ice cream some like chocolate and some dont even like ice cream....it just depends no two people are alike. Hope this helps ps i am an older woman if this needs tO be accounted for lol

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (5 August 2013):

Honeypie agony aunt

I HOPE the majority of those who DO have anal enjoy it, otherwise that is just sad.

Personally, it's not for me, but that doesn't mean your GF isn't enjoying herself.

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (5 August 2013):

tennisstar88 agony auntNo! The anus is an exit for bowels, not an entrance for peckers! I cannot stand it, due to the physical pain It causes me.

In your new lover's case, she may have a loose enough rectal region of where she finds pleasure in it. I find men enjoy it because it's a tight area.

You may not even need to use lube, but I would certainly wear a condom to avoid any feces getting on your pecker...or at the very worst inside causing an infection. The large intestine to the rectum is a very septic region. Protect yourself.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2013):

Ummm how can a woman orgasm through anal sex? Do we orgasm when we pass faeces - NO! To the men (or women) who wonder what it feels like, try experimenting with a cucumber or imagine the last time you passed an uncomfortable stool.

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A female reader, Scotlass65 United Kingdom +, writes (4 August 2013):

Scotlass65 agony auntYou would be surprised more women love anal sex and not admitting to it

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A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (4 August 2013):

As a guy my experience is that most women have a love hate relationship with it. I had a girlfriend who insisted she'd never do it so don't ask. One day while she was menstruating she asked for it because she was horny. She loved it but didn't want a repeat. Other girls, similar experiences.

My wife is grossed out by the idea but the few times we've done it she really liked it as well.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2013):

Unless she likes pain and feeling of wanting to go to the bathroom.

I personally can't imagine who might want to like anal, unless you are a gay guy. It hurts, it's an icky feeling like you want to poop, and what does it do for pleasure for a woman, I dont understand. But also I don't understand lots of things like finishing into a mouth during blow jobs. For me its just disgusting, but women do it all the time. We do lots of things to please our partner that we wouldn't do otherwise. I give oral not because I enjoy it but because I know how much pleasure my boyfriends gets from it. It really doesn't turn me on, I do it only for one reason to please him. Thank god, he doesn't have anyprecum, and he smells nice.

Frankly the fact that she said she prefers it to vaginal sex is weird. I would understand if a guy says it, because anal feels much tighter for them than vaginal sex, but for a woman it's very strange. If she said, I don't mind it,mthats I would understand but to prefer it?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2013):

I recently started this with my husband. If it's done right, it can be enjoyable for a women.

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (4 August 2013):

person12345 agony auntThe vast majority do not like it, but I'm sure some do! Just be sure to be safe, lots of lube, and wear a condom so you won't be in danger of UTIs.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (4 August 2013):

CindyCares agony aunt As far as I know, in general women are not fond of anal sex. Many won't do it , or will do it just to please their partners, not because they find it particularly enjoyable. BUT : women are all different from each other , and have a lots of differents wants and needs and kinks and fantasies, so yes, I think it's quite possible she asked because she does enjoy it. Why not ? There are women who enjoy even more extreme things, - being urinated on and stuff like that - so I don't see why she could not just be someone who really likes anal sex. That she may belong to somewhat of a minority does not mean that this minority does not exist.

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