A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hello, in the last two years I have been in two relationships, both were divorced, one 8 months, the other 9 years, I was both their first guy since being single. They both lasted two months,they both said the same thing about their exs, they were treated real bad, an physically abuse, Ive never treated women like that , always a gentleman, an nice. Nether gave me a reason for the break up, found out later they both went back to their abusive exs. Could it have been, you know I only heard their side of the story, they both treated me bad at the end. Could it had been, they treated me like their exs treated them, they didnt know how to take being treated good, I havent heard any thing from them, I always do no contact, but I still think about them every day, one has been a year an a half, the other a month, should I change, it seems like the guy who acts like he don't give a s..t, always gets the good girls, an us nice guys always finish last, I feel like if you don't take a chance you can't find love.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2014): Nice guys don't finish last... because they're never even considered to be in the running by women.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (15 January 2014):
 I think you are selecting women who are abuse victims… I don't know why, I would venture to say it would be a very good idea to find out why you want to play the knight in shining armor to these sadly damaged and hurt women and why it is you stick around to be avoided and then treated so poorly by these sadly damaged and hurt women…. In a very sad way, you have some similarities with them. You tolerate behavior that most people would not…
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (15 January 2014):
Some girls, like some guys, are attracted to the bad ones. In this situation, however, it sounds like you’ve dated women who have become locked in a pattern of accepting abuse and mistreatment. Over time they have fallen in to that trap of sticking to what feels comfortable for them, even if that means being hurt and treated badly. Abusive partners lock their victims in to this pattern by chipping away at your self-confidence and sense of self-worth so it becomes hard to believe you’re actually worthy of anything better. Fragile and dependent, it’s better to accept the downsides to have that manipulative partner in your life, than go it alone. Unfortunately whilst they remain in a state of acceptance about mistreatment, what you can offer is something they neither want nor are comfortable with. The good news is that good guys don’t always come last, so don’t look for deeper meaning and try to disguise your true self because a couple of relationships ended badly for you. You don’t always meet the right person first time around, or even the first time it feels like it’s getting serious.
I wish you all the very best.
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