A
female
age
41-50,
*upid lover
writes:I have friends but I am quite sure that they are mostly frenemies. Things have happened and they have behaved in certain ways and done things that have proven they are not a true friend. Does anybody else feel this way? Is this normal? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (20 November 2013):
 I have no frenimes... just folks I know as acquaintances that I do not trust.. I do not call them friends.
If people do not support you 100% they are not friends...
sometimes support does not mean being kind however.. if a true friend is to tell you something that hurts that does not mean they are a frenmy... it means they are a good true friend.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2013): No. Where I come from, we "clean house." When so-called "friends" do things that you can't overlook or easily forgive. They have to be gone. You don't keep them around close enough to occupy the position of an enemy. You simply cut ties. Keep it cool, distant, and casual. You don't waste energy on hate.
Frenemies will turn on you. They repeat transgressions, and you could get severely hurt in the process. It's foolish to keep people around you see as an "enemy." They most likely were never friends. Once you know better, you get rid of them.
People who love drama keep frenemies. I don't have time for that.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2013): I understand what you are saying, i have had these feelings too, sometimes. Mostly when some close has hurt me, but thats the best thing about close friends you can forgive them and they will forgive you too, when you mess up. Im sure you have messed up hurt some one you love unintentionally of course.If it keeps happening though and you feel someone is intentionally pretending to be your friend and trying to hurt you, you of course remove them from your life straight away.Just be realistic no body is perfect. Its human nature to be jealous, competitive and selfish. In friendships and families too these traits cause conflicts. Its how we react and deal with these situations that matters. You can cut everyone out of your life, find a new set of friends but these issues will just pop up again and again. You have to show people how you need to be treated and fight for respect, people can only walk on you and hurt you if you let them.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 November 2013):
 I wouldn't keep "frenemies" around, there is a reason they aren't friends and I don't have room for toxic people.
I think it's ridiculous to keep people around who you don't care for and you know don't care about you either.
So many it's time to find some people who are NOT "frenemies" but actual friends. What's the point of the people if you see them as "frenemies"?
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A
female
reader, shna  +, writes (19 November 2013):
 Some girls go through this ! I personally never did but you know at the end of the day all girls bitch and bicker about one another ! Even the girls you dont expect to !
It could just be a phase these girls are going through
My advice find some new friends who are not going to treat you in a way that makes you feel awful
You could always sit these girls down an discuss what the problem
Is but in my opinion that could end horribly wrong for u !!
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