A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I really liked this friend of mine, so I asked him to a girls choice dance. Everything went perfectly! He even kissed me goodnight. I figured after that night I should tell him how I feel, so I did. Apparently that was a big mistake! He was flattered, but didn't know if he felt the same. I decided to give him a few days to think about it. I tried to talk to him about it a few days later, but things were weird. I decided to have a friend ask him. She text him, and then called me. She said she had big news. He told her that he only liked me as a friend, but didn't know how to tell me. So I decided to text him, and tell him that I was still hung up on my ex and that I wanted to be just friends with him. That was a big mistake! He was cool with the friends thing, but now I want to be more. Do I tell him? Do I just leave it alone? Should I just forget about him and move on? Ahh! :)
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female
reader, Love_is_all_youu_need +, writes (21 November 2008):
Oh dear, things didn't turn out too well then? Same with me, I told a guy friend that i loved him (i was drunk) at a party... I then emailed him when i'd got back home and (still being drunk) confirmed that i meant what i'd said, Then he mailed me back saying that he wants to get back with his ex, but he was being really nice about it - and was keen on staying friends and not throwing our friendship away because of it.Things were really awkward when we saw each other again, but after a couple of days things gradually turned back to normal. So basically we are 'friends' ...nothings changed!The best advice i can give you, which i am following myself... is to lay off him - by that i don't mean to ignore/stop talking to him, but if you text him on a regular basis then stop doing so! When you see him again, apologise tell him in person that you're "really sorry and insist that you really want to stay friends" he'll respect you more for telling him to his face rather than text. and if you do so/or are planning to, don't act flirty with him or even worse try getting off with him. It'll drive him away, especially since he does not feel the same way.On a more positive side, if you do as above... then in time, he might begin to develop feelings for you! The trick is to let HIM do the chasing, if he wants you he'll come after you. If he doesn't then he'll avoid the subject and probably never mention it again... But don't stress too much if he avoids the subject, because these things take time. If you only like someone as a friend, then it'll take alot of time to develop love-like feelings for them... i can't guarantee this will actually happen but its a genuine possibility that one day he could tell you that he loves you back - what a surprise that would be! But it all depends on whether you want to wait that long? Because some guys are shy, and may not admit to you straight away how they feel. And to avoid him doubting your feelings for him, always give hints that you're interested. With the guy i like, I gaze at him lovingly into his eyes for a few seconds then turn away... so hes aware that i still like him!One thing you could do, is get a boyfriend - or even a close guy friend will do. And hug them regularly, talk to them whenever you get the chance.. Then if this friend of yours notices, you may notice signs of jealousy! Then he'll be encouraged to confess how he feels, as he'll know that you're trying to move on with your life and he'll be scared that you'll fall out of love with him. I really hope i've helped...But do remember, he may never love you like you love him. Just give him time to figure out how he feels, you'll soon discover the answer. And don't forget to back off him for a while, he needs his own space.Good luck xxx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2008): just move on.. obviously he just wants to be friends, so just be friends.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2008): If some person doesn't feel the same way about you you cannot force them to feel that way about you.Love is not pressured or forced.If he has told it very clearly to your friend he probably meant it.
How many ever times you ask the guy is going to say "No".Leave it alone.Give your attention to the guys who are waiting for you to notice them.All the best.
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