A
female
age
41-50,
*upid lover
writes:Yesterday, I found out that I have hsv2 (genital herpes). I have been dating a guy for over 3 months and am not sure wether to tell him. He goes overseas for between 6 and 9 months tomorrow. This is a trip that he has been planning with a friend of his for a long time and I don't know wether I should put this on him before he goes or wait until he comes back. He is an amazing person but takes his health very seriously. The doctor told me that the test results shows that I have had this for years but I never had an outbreak. It has not been a big deal for me or altered my lifestyle at all. I just don't want to ruin his trip by telling him now. I also don't want to turn him off. If I tell him now, he might use the time away from me to get over me and move on. If I don't tell him now and wait until he gets back (if he is still interested in seeing me by then)he may think that I cheated. We have both said that we will not be sleeping with other people while he is away. I understand that I need to tell him at some stage in case he has it as well.Please give me some advice on what to do. My doctor said that I should tell him before he goes and that if he is a good guy he will not care.Any thoughts will be appreciated a lot.Thank you
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female
reader, teencrushoffender  +, writes (19 March 2011):
 You have to tell him the truth. He shouldn't be mad, but glad you told him. Would you rather he kept carrying this around without knowing and suddenly flaring up and accusing you of cheating? The sooner he finds out the sooner he can be treated and you'll both be worry free.Do what is for the best - tell the truth.Good Luck in Love.
A
female
reader, Thepolarbear +, writes (16 March 2011):
Tell him the truth before he goes otherwise it will cause huge suspicion on his part and could result in some nasty arguments. I haven't been in your situation before but i can imagine it wouldn't be great when you come home from a long trip and your partner tells you they have an STI. I know I would instantly be suspicious and I would wonder why my partner didn't tell me before I went away.
Bite the bullet and tell him before he goes!
If he loves you and trusts you it shouldnt be a problem
xx
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj +, writes (16 March 2011):
 Listen to your doctor.
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