A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:this sounds pretty silly, but i think i need help. i've tried explaining to my mum how i feel about things and i said to her that i need to speak with someone proffesionaly but she just laughed and said i was a teenager and that i would feel like i do the odd time. but i feel like it every second of every day. i feel like people don't really like me, and all i want to do every day is drink alcohol. i lend money - eventhough i know i wont be able to pay back and just get myself drunk or go out on the town and try and blag drinks off men in clubs. i feel really down inside but at the same time i can be laughing and having a good time. thats what i mean none of it makes sense. i don't take any drugs or anything- i've experimented with them but that was only a few times when i came out of a long-term relationship last year. i've thought about everything i feel and do and realised this downward spiral all started when i came out of that relationship. but that was over a year ago now- i feel 'over it' all, the odd time i reflect back and get a little angry or upset but thats mostly when im drunk. i'm not suicidal or anything, i feel happy with life- i dont want to waste it away but i just feel so confused about what im doing. sometimes as well i even stop and think to myself 'why am i thinking those things or why am i doing this' and i think im crazy. for example last night i lent money off a friend and we went out on the town- blagged a few drinks for us and then slept back at my friends house in the spare room but i sat in front of the mirror for about half an hour just staring into my eyes drinking a glass of vodka- eventhough it was 4am. my friend said i was mad carrying on drinking as all she wanted to do was sleep. i got in bed n couldn't sleep so i was just staring at the ceiling. everyone else jus see's me as a normal girl, who likes to have a laugh have a drink at weekends etc. nobody understands how i'm feeling. can anybody help? i know it all sounds daft haha but advice would help :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy mum isnt a bad person; if anything, she's the BEST. she just doesnt realise; she doesnt know about the clubbing and all that because i lie to her and say im sleeping at a cousins/friends house. thanks for all your help anyway i've booked an appointment with my GP
A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (16 May 2009):
 Your question is anything but daft. To be honest it doesn't sound like you have strong role-models in your life. If you were my daughter, the clubbing, drinking and staying with friends all night just wouldn't happen - not because I am old-fashioned or a spoil-sport, it would just be parental worry about what might happen to you at your age. If your mother is dismissing your concerns then you definitely need to speak to someone else who is more responsible.
If you are drinking and trying to blag drinks off older men then it possibly puts you in a position where you are on a downward spiral into a lifestyle that puts you at emotional and physical jeopardy. It may well be the case that you have a mood disorder - depression or bipolar - underpinning this behaviour. I would recommend that you go to your GP and ask for a referral to a counsellor. You can see your GP without your parent's knowledge and the consultation would be confidential. There are adolescent counsellors available who you can talk to about how you are feeling. Alternatively there maybe a counselling service available through your school, so check with a teacher that you feel able to speak to. It may well be the case that you going through a phase, but the drinking and clubbing lifestyle is a worry at your age and you should see someone with professional expertise who can help you understand how you feel.
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A
female
reader, sammi star +, writes (16 May 2009):
 Yes all teenagers go through this but if you're feeling like this everyday and drinking all the time then it's quite possible that you do need help. A lot of young people in your situation refuse to accept that there is even anything wrong with their lives so you've done really well admitting that you could do with some help. I'm sure if your mum knew how bad you were really feeling she wouldn't just dismiss it as teen problems. Talk to her again, explain to her in depth, like you have on here, exactly what's going on in your life. If she really won't help you (which I'm sure she will once you talk to her again) then you can always visit your GP by yourself and ask him about getting some help. And don't think that what you're feeling is 'daft' either, you deserve to get this sorted and be happy. Good luck x
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A
male
reader, Neboraic +, writes (16 May 2009):
I cant give advice i can only sympathise, the laughing on the outside and crying on the inside, the feeling that no one likes or cares for you, the feeeling of not being a normal person. It all sounds familiar if you substitute alcohol for TV. My problem was my dismal social and love life and i am working to improve them. What i cant figure out is what your life is missing. Professional help is worth a try. You should also do some soul searching. Also, having an outlet helps, someone to share it with (prefereably one who is also going through something similar), i dont talk to anyone but instead i write songs (which are full of pain) and diary entries.
I hope that helps.
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A
male
reader, helpdan? +, writes (16 May 2009):
hi, i think you should just think positive all the time and everything will be cool. Try to let off the drinking a bit, it will make you more depressed the more you drink. Everybody has moments like yours! keep your head up and don't over think things, chill girl, take it easy, as long as you do what you want to do and have fun every thing will be okay. hope this helps, DAN!!!
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