A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i am so confused with me and my boyfriend. my ex boyfriend has started to like me, and he is the type of guy you can't resist crushing on. lately it hasn't felt right between me and my boyfriend (once i found out my ex liking me) my boyfrien is the sweetest guy and so nice to me, but i don't know if i want a boyfriend anymore. somedays i do, somedays i don't. it is so hard thinking about what the future would be like if we weren't together. what should i do about this? should i break it off with my boyfriend (that i still do have feelings for) or should i stay with him and see what happens.
View related questions:
crush, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2008): Okay, I'm in the same situation. My ex has come back full force trying to get me back...my new guy is in Mexico right now for work...he is very non-chalant about our whole relationship...but he is a sweet and kind man. I'm very confused. I don't want to throw away 5 years of my relationship with my ex, but I want to see where things might go with the new guy...I don't want to ruin that forever either. I'm pretty stuck. I think though, that you have to listen to your heart. What I've decided to do is take a step back, go to NC and breathe. When I do something fun, I'm going to say to myself, oh, I wish ________ were here. Whomever's name pops into my head, whomever I want with me while I'm having a blast, that's who I should be with...I think. Try that.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2008): you know what you should get back with your ex
am in the same boat as your ex trying to get back with my wife
we may be ex's for a reason but am sure he made you happy before and will again
you know what to do
...............................
A
male
reader, jamiej  +, writes (18 January 2008):
 Think the second answer kinda hit this one right on the head. He's your EX for a reason!!
You say you've only started questioning your current relationship since you found out your ex still liked you. What's happening here is that your ex is playing on your history together, and you are suddenly forgetting about all the bad times you had - there must have been some else he wouldn't be your ex - and fantasising about the good times, and what could have been.
Things happen for a reason, and clearly you've moved on and got a new life with your new bf. Give him a chance, and don't step backwards unless you know it's going to be positive this time round with your ex!
...............................
A
female
reader, Brooke123 +, writes (17 January 2008):
Heya, it sounds like ur current boyfriend is lovely and makes u happy. You need to think about the fact that it obviously wasnt working in the past with ur ex boyfriend and just because hes come back doesnt mean stop whats making u happy now. You need to not only think whats best for urself but also about ur current boyfriends feelings. You obviously still like him but if u are doubting him then dont persue the relationship its not faire on him. I personally think u should carry on with ur boyfriend now and leave ur ex alone, whats in the past is there for a reason. The questions ur asking urself about the future etc. is jst cos ur thinking into it too mch. Try and relax and let things happen. Good luck and email me on the private thing if u wana talk more. x
...............................
A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (17 January 2008):
 Hi,
"i am so confused with me and my boyfriend. my ex boyfriend has started to like me, and he is the type of guy you can't resist crushing on"
I think he's your EX for a reason. If it didn't work out what makes you think it'll work out next time round?
"lately it hasn't felt right between me and my boyfriend (once i found out my ex liking me) my boyfriend is the sweetest guy and so nice to me"
Well, when things aren't going so well, some people often start looking outside the relationship. I have to say I was talking to a female colleague at work and she said to me that when sh'e happy with her relationship she doesn't notice guys. However, she said, when things aren't going so well, or we're going through a rough patch, I do tend to notice other guys.
"but i don't know if i want a boyfriend anymore. somedays i do, somedays i don't. it is so hard thinking about what the future would be like if we weren't together. what should i do about this?"
What I don't understand is what has your EX stating to like you again got to do with a) questioning whether you should be with your current boyfriend and; b) questionging whether you want a boyfriend at all
As you put it somedays you do, somedays you don't. What do you really want? ONLY YOU CAN FIGURE THAT OUT.
"should i break it off with my boyfriend (that i still do have feelings for) or should i stay with him and see what happens"
That depends...
If YOU'RE not happy and don't feel it's worth saving or even talking to him about it then yes.
If you want to revisit your EX then do both of you a favour and break it off. Must admit, I do get the impression you want your EX - I might be wrong - I can only go by what you've written here.
On the other hand if you have feelings for your boyfriend then I think you should talk to him about it and see where to go from there.
Best of luck :)
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (17 January 2008):
 You don't have to break off from your b/f , you can still be friends with your ex until your thoughts become clear who is the better man.
...............................
|
