A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:The other day my boyfriend of a year in a half, ask me to go to the movies with him and his two new female friends. I didnt really want to go because I already felt jealous and insecure that these girls were cool with my boyfriend (i know it sounds stupid). It really bothers me alot when he makes new female friends because one they all want to get to know me (for some odd reason) and two they may start liking my boyfriend. Anyway, my boyfriend made me go with him to the movies where one of the girls was at, the other one didnt showed up. I was perfectly fine until we met the other girl. Then, I became distance. I hung in the back while my boyfriend and this girl walk ahead of me. I stop at stores without telling them, making them walk off without me,and I was quiet the whole time. By the end of the night, my boyfriend was mad at me because he didnt like me being in the back and he didnt like the way I was acting. I felt jealous and didnt want to be there. I wanted my boyfriend all to myself. He paid for everybody's dinner including hers, and he tried to walk in the middle of us because he wasnt going to leave her up in the front by herself, but he didnt wanna leave me. I just didnt like it. I hate going out with him and his female friends. I think its stupid. Am I crazy? Am I being selfish? Do I have a right to be jealous?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2008): Totally agree with you! I would have been upset, too! I would rather have my BF to myself, too. I think if my BF wanted to include friends who happen to girls when we go out, he should try to make sure that EVERYONE sees that I was his GF and make ME feel that he was with me. I think i know how you feel because a guy who has been showing interest in me (and i am interested in him, too) has been telling me that he's been best friend with this girl for 8 years and that they've done everything together. THAT bothers me. So to me, if he wants to be with me, he would have to show ME that I take precedence. If not, he does not deserve me. Likewise, if your BF does not show that YOU take precedence, he does not deserve you, and of course, he has the right to expect the same thing from you. Good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you humurous anger!!!! lol. I feel alot better that I am not the only out there who is territorical!!! (is that a word?) I just dont wanna be around my BF when hes around his female friends. And I trust him alone with them because he isnt that type guy at all. I just dont want to be enjoying my time with someone else. Thank you!!!! ^_^
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A
female
reader, humorous_anger +, writes (11 October 2008):
You do have the right to be jealous. I personally don't like my boyfriend trying to go out with me and another girl. Your BG should realize that these girls are not your friends, that they make you feel insecure (as they would do to almost any girl), and that rather than trying to collect girlfriends, he should be scheduling special time for just you and him. I don't mind if my BF goes out with some friends who happen to be girls (at least not alone) but he knows that I don't want to go with him on those occasions. You should let your boyfriend know it too. I used to react the same way that you did before I got really angry and told him that I simply didn't like hanging out with the girls he was friends with. I didn't forbid him from continuing to be friends with him...I just made it known that I don't enjoy sharing his time with another girl. It might just be my animalistic territorial-ness taking over but, hey, the animals don't seem to have problems with this system.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone for your answers. I agreed, I did take a hissy fit, and it was unfair and rude to everyone. I try not to get jealous, but I think its just the way I am sometimes. I know if it was a male friend, I wouldnt have acted that way. And I know that if it was just me and his female friend, I wouldnt have acted that way. I woulda been totally opened. I will try more better to receive his friends and if I cant, then I just wont hang out with them. Its better that way so I dont make it seem like im a rude girlfriend.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone for your answers. I agreed, I did take a hissy fit, and it was unfair and rude to everyone. I try not to get jealous, but I think its just the way I am sometimes. I know if it was a male friend, I wouldnt have acted that way. And I know that if it was just me and his female friend, I wouldnt have acted that way. I woulda been totally opened. I will try more better to receive his friends and if I cant, then I just wont hang out with them. Its better that way so I dont make it seem like im a rude girlfriend.
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A
female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (11 October 2008):
 I have to agree with Fade.
I dont believe you at all had the right to be jealous. He is trying to make friends and introduce you to them so you guys can all hang out together. Be social and have a grea time out and show his new friends what a wonderful person you are to him. But it seems you are too preoccupied with the gender of his friends.
Tell me, do you think if his new friends were male you would have acted like this?
Seriously, I think you already realise that you took a total hissy fit and trust me that it will only get worse if you do not sort it out. It will cause un-needed stress and problems in the relationship. You just put your boyfriend between a rock and a hard spot by the way you were acting. It was very childish. If you keep this up he will eventually not want to deal with this type of situation again and just not ask you the next time.
If he didn't include you exactly then how would you feel? Would you be the type to constantly worry about what is happening? And who cares if another girl likes him? Do you trust him? If you do then it doesn't matter cause nothing will happen.
I hope the best for you,
HonningKanin
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A
female
reader, {*HyPa~AzN~hUnNiE~*}  +, writes (10 October 2008):
 you have every right to be jealous!!
firstly i dont accept my boyfriend to have females friends at all!! and he has to listen to me or he'll lose me.
but i see that your different. tel him that you dont mind him having female friends but not to get to close cos it almost seems like flirting from what youve said!
just have a word with him
xxx
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A
female
reader, gembo +, writes (10 October 2008):
I would probably talk to your boyfriend about this but the question is do you trust him enough to hang out with other girls.
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