A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need help so badly, I can't believe what's happening at the moment; basically, yesterday in our sixth form common room...well, actually, that's a really bad starting point. Sorry, but this is going to be a long one, I'm just so upset right now (literally crying my eyes out, I'm so pathetic).There's this girl 'R' who joined our sixth form at the beginning of the year (I'm in lower sixth/year 12) and she's quite violent/angry, even though she claims she's Buddhist.In the year above, we share quite a few friends and there's this guy 'B' who I have a huge crush on. There's also this other guy 'C' who R likes and literally, EVERYONE knows it.Anyway, B took her phone, gave it to me, I gave it back to B (all the while R was trying to get it back), the phone got passed around the table then another girl texted C 'Do you want to go to town with me, I really like you' from R's phone. R took my phone, threatened to smash it, ran off with it for a while. I laughed about it with my friends, it eventually turned up, as did hers and she's been blanking me ever since, I tried to speak to her and she replied 'F**k off' really viciously.So, today I come into school and I was talking to a friend who is in her class and he told me that on the day this whole phone business happened, she was muttering something about 'revenge is so sweet' and apparently she was planning to wreck things between B and me and that 'things were already set in motion'.I honestly don't know what I have done to upset her so much, she said herself that she had sorted out the text that got sent to C and I held the phone twice in total. Yes, it was stupid, yes, it was immature, but I had no clue that she would react so badly and I thought it was just banter like normal.I'm so scared she's said something to B; apparently she thought that I was flirting with C to make B jealous and I'm terrifed she's said something like that to him. If she just told him that I fancy him . . I can live with that.I think I'm probably paranoid, but I've been on facebook chat and it always seems that whenever I come on, he signs off even though we've had really long chats the past week. Although this sometimes happens with lots of people on facebook, so I really hope I'm just being paranoid. I was chatting to another friend who was trying to be a middle man between R and I and he said that she didn't actually say anything to B and that things were stopped before they happened, but I don't trust R. Apparently she 'doesn't care' about what happened and 'as far as she's concerned it didn't happen'. BUT; she's still ignoring me. Apparently she just 'doesn't feel like talking to me'. I don't know about you, but that doesn't seem like not caring.I honestly thought that this was going to be my time to be happy, I know that sounds so pathetic, but it's true - Ive always been so unlucky with guys and this was going so well. And now it's destroyed.I'm trying to be optimistic and I'm hoping that she didn't say anything to B about flirting with C (which I wasn't) or liking him. My (feeble proof) for this is that he replied to a little message I sent him yesterday with no animosity whatsoever.If you had heard that someone was flirting with someone to make you jealous, it's not like you would reply: 'Nice though thats poisoning which is probably fair game on dom!! Arr R is fine she'll chill out at some point its boring being pi**ed off! Yea have a good time in uganda! Xx'(Ignore the poisoning bit, it's an in-joke, I'm not a meglomaniac :p )Am I just over-reacting? Or do I have good reason to be worried? Because I feel really s**t about myself and my apologetic mood is rapidly turning into a pi**ed off one since - I admit, I was immature - but I did not set out to be malicious and spitefull and I can not pre-empt what people are going to do. I don't feel as though I deserve this sort of treatment as I did not intend or set out to offend or upset R yet with this revenge stuff, she was/is meaning to be deliberately spiteful.Any advice or viewa welcome!! In any form at all.Thanks
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2011): you have no reason to be worried. it seems to me that he knows how R is acting and probably would realize she could potential exaggerate things (or make stuff up) when she's angry. i don't think she'll be able to ruin anything, since as you stated she is pretty violent/angry. so really don't worry, if anything does happen it could be easily sorted out through explaining how angry she was. :)
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