A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been seeing this boy for about 3 months now. And, in that short amount of time I have fallen head over heels for him. I have told him that I love him, and he says he loves me too, sometimes. He said he doesn't feel comfortable saying that he loves me but he says he really means it. He also has a very short fuse when it comes to me. He gets really upset really fast at simple things, and he threatens to not talk to me anymore but never follows through with it. He also claims he doesn't talk to other girls, but I know he does. I have seen it happen right in front of me. And, I keep telling myself that I won't talk to him anymore to save myself the heartbreak but I can't stay away from him. Do I continue to keep seeing him in hopes that he warms up to me? Or do I just do my best to leave and save myself from it? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (14 February 2013):
 “he says he loves me too sometimes”
I take it from the above statement that you don’t believe him. And you shouldn’t. his behavior is not matching his words.
My husband loves me madly passionately and very deeply. He never says it. He won’t say it even today on Valentine’s day. But I know he does so while I miss hearing it every now and then… I listen to his actions not his words….
HE THREATENS not to talk to you? What would you do if he threatened to beat you up? Would you take that? Why are any threats from anyone acceptable… the fact that you hang around and take that has told him you are a doormat.
You say you love him… what about him do you love… his short fuse? His threats to not talk to you? His LIES about other girls?
So he threatens you
He lies to you
He has a terrible temper (short fuse)
And yet you love him…. Or do you love having a partner and the idea of being in love?
3 months and you know in your gut that you leaving is the best thing to do, that’s why you are asking complete strangers what to do…. Would you want your mom to be treated this way by her husband? What about a little sister? Is this guy good enough for your best friend?
If yes… then stay… but know that he’s not going to change and it’s going to get worse as he’s on his best behavior now…
A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse  +, writes (14 February 2013):
 I disagree with CMMP.
That short fuse sounds to me like he's the jealous type. I assume this is every time you talk to a guy? He threatens to not talk to you anymore to control you.
This guy is insecure and jealous and best left alone anyway in my opinion. If you do get together his jealousy and insecurities will destroy the relationship. It will be a matter of time.
Go find someone else who isn't the jealous type and have fun.
This doesn't sound like fun to me. Sounds to me like you'll be walking on eggshells all the time. Every time a guy smiles or talks to you, even if you're not flirting, this guy will go mad, and stomp off in a little tantrum.
Do you really want that from a relationship?
If it were me, I said bye bye and move on.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (14 February 2013):
Aside from having a short fuse I'm not seeing a big problem here. You might be expecting too much from him, which basically means that the two of you are incompatible.
Move on. It's only hard for a while, but being with someone you're not compatible with is hard indefinitely.
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