A
female
age
36-40,
*eppuni
writes:I was friends with my current boyfriend for two years before we started dating. Back when we were just friends, he told me all about the porn he'd make with his girlfriend. Now that we're dating, I find myself wondering whether he still has all that stuff on his computer. Should I ask him or leave it alone? It's bothering me.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2008): Look, if he's a human male, he's going to have kept that porn somewhere, and he'll probably lie about it, but even if he admits to it, he'll probably keep it even if you tell him to get rid of it. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you. Let him keep the porn. It's not a big deal.
If I had porn of an ex-girlfriend, there's no way on God's Earth that I would get rid of it, no matter what my wife said. But that doesn't mean I don't love my wife.
The simple fact is, he loves YOU now, but some guys need the variety that porn provides.
A
female
reader, DancingBrownEyes41695  +, writes (13 October 2008):
 well since its really bothering you maybe casually bring it up to him in a conversation. ask him if he deleted it or if its still on there. if he takes this question as a fight just calmy talk to him and say i am bothered by the thought of you and your ex girlfriends porn is still on your computer. If he says no i deleted that a while ago or something in that nature dont worry about it. if he says siomething else such as o i completely forgot that was on there i will delete it soon or no i havent deleted it yet. ask him if him nicely if he could delete it.
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A
female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (13 October 2008):
hmm thats a hard one. well maybe you should just casually bring it up, but not make it a big deal.if you are abit adventurous in the bedroom maybe you should make your own private porn, so then he has you on tape rather then his ex. but the best thing to do is just be honest with him, there's no point lying or pretending that it does not bother you. honesty is what makes relationships work after all.
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