A
male
age
41-50,
*ockontommy
writes:Firstly, I'm 30 and maybe a little older than the regular users of this site but in my desperation for answers I'm giving this a shot. Heres the story so far....In March 09 I started a new job, one of my first days was a training induction on which I met a girl (lets call her Ann)who was already with my new company. Ann is a couple of years younger than me and I fell for her straight away before we'd really spoken to each other. In general conversation Ann mentioned a couple of times that she had a boyfriend and so I decided to nip his one in th bud straight away, not wanting to get carried away with thoughts of a girl I couldn't have. To my surprise it was Ann that was showing signs of liking me and though I didnt do anything to encourage it I was obviously enjoying this. Over the next few days working with Ann (on occasion just the two of us) I noticed these signs of interest from Ann kept coming. 'Great', I thought, she likes me. However, I respected her situation and liked her too much to say or do anything. Soon after we were placed in different work locations and so getting to see her became virtually impossible and then after a month or so I heard Ann had left for another job. I was gutted and didn't think I'd ever see her again. Over the next four months whilst working for these different companies I did meet Ann another three times. Twice she came to see me at my work and once 'conveniently' turned up on the one day I happened to be working at a different location. Coincidence? I don't think so. On each of these occasions I saw enough signs from Ann to know she was still interested in me. My job was only temporary for sixth months and then I'd be leaving, when the sixth months came round, Ann, by now had rejoined the company. Typical! I was faced with the possibillity of leaving and probably never seeing Ann again. I couldn't let this happen as I needed to know if she had feelings for me. This had been eating me alive inside for the last 6 months, I needed an answer! I chose a day when I new there would be a good chance of talking to Ann on her own and went to see her. She was pleased to see me and even suggested we walked away to a quieter spot to have our conversation. It was so nice talking with her, it felt so good. The perfect moment arose for me to tell her how I felt when we were about to say goodbye to each other but neither of us obviously wanted to go away from each other and we ended up just looking at each other in a longing silence. I couldn't find the right words but broke the silence by asking if there were any staff nights out planned. She said 'yes' and that she would ring me if anything was arranged and so we swapped phone numbers. I left her that afternoon with a feeling that we'd 'silently' showed our feelings for one another and by swapping numbers we now had a possibillity of contacting each other so this was fairly positive but it wasn't enough - I still didnt have the answer I wanted. Later that afternoon, in a moment of madness, I went back to see her, found her on her own and told her straight that I liked her and had done since day 1. I apologised if it meant our friendship would be spoilt by this but I had to tell her in case I never saw her again. She was a little shocked by this event but looked pleased at what I said and smiled a lovely smile. I could see she was lost for words and so I said I'd go and leave it at that. She said she'd text me. And text me she did about an hour later saying she'd like to meet for a drink but was unsure because of her boyfriend. I said its up to you Ann, you do whatever you think is right. A week later she texted me again suggesting we meet up and maybe go for a walk. The day we spent together was perfect! A beautiful Autumn day and lovely scenery and Ann was great company. We talked about each others lives, famillies and our hopes and dreams and I know Ann was happy. We had fun and made each other laugh and on the way home Ann thanked me for a lovely day. As far as her current relationship goes, she mentioned a few times that things were a little 'fractious' with her boyfriend and I read from her words that she didn't really see it going anywhere. She also didn't seem too dissapointed about this which was a good sign for me. However, although there were many, many signs of her liking me I still had no confirmation that anything ever looked likely to happen. We parted without any further plan to meet up (I didnt want to push my luck or make her feel uncomfortable or hurried) but I feel, that we'll meet again soon, although I dont know this for sure. Can anyone who has read this shed any light on how this girl is thinking? Do her feelings for me extend to me being a possible boyfriend or longer term partner? Is she just sussing me out? Anyone, please help?
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2009): She likes you but i think she's allready playing you allong. She's giving you the impression that she could be single soon. Quote. "she mentioned a few times that things were a little 'fractious' with her boyfriend and I read from her words that she didn't really see it going anywhere." Tell her you would love to date her and if she ever becomes single you hope she will get in touch with you. But dont hold your breath. Then walk away. She will contact you soon on some pretext. But you will find that she is still with the guy. This may happen a few times. Tell her you have suddenly gone right of her or turned gay or something before she gives you that " i like you as a friend" line.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2009): I don't think that you should persue this one. For one thing, she has a boyfriend. No relationship should start while another has not ended. As far any relationship, there are always little "fractures'. None of us are perfect. She is not done with this relationship. Take it from a woman, when we're done, we're done. From your post, she has not indicated that she has any indications of leaving, only "fractures". I wouldn't set myself up for falling in love and getting hurt. You don't want to be second best. Get out there start meeting new people. If it is meant to be, then she will come to you, single. Best of luck to you.
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (18 October 2009):
I think she is sussing you out. However, two things. One, before anything can happen, she must get rid of her currest boyfriend. Two, be aware that she will need time to get over him. The truth is, if she's really interested in you, she'll dump her boyfriend and start seeing you. Give her time.
...............................
|
