A
female
age
36-40,
*hite_Lillies
writes:I live with my ex and I somewhere feel for her though she's in a relationship with someone else.She loves drinking and hanging out with her friends. I have serious issues with her lifestyle and her bad habits.More she's not physically sound as she has some auto-immune disease and under medication.She drinks all night long and would come at 5 -7am in the morning and it disturbs me a lot that i cant even sleep the whole night.This is insanely making me crazy and affecting my work and my financial state as I am the only person earning and my salary falls short for two people.Still I somehow manage it and I never bring up money matter in our fights as it would hurt her.Last night I fought with her and told that I could not stand her anymore, as she never listens to what I say and understands me.She told me that I don't mean a thing and accused me of being controlling.I have also said that I wanna move out and stay away from her.She keeps hurting me, but I pity her as she has none to look after.Am I doing the right thing by telling her that I wanna leave her? Please help me she's not that bad but she doesn't understand me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): I think you're doing the right thing by being honest. This might be the wake-up call she needs to get her life together...If it didn't come from you, it would come from someone else. It's not you hurting her so much as you disillusioning her. It would have happened anyway at some point.
Your situation is also really murky...it sounds too murky to be living together.
She's an ex, yet you suspect her of cheating, yet you let her live with you, and you support her? I think it's time to define your boundaries with her, otherwise she'll keep using you.
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