A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I've heard that women hate it when men don't look at them or pay them any attention, and liking the guy or being in a relationship already is irrelevant. I had an attractive young woman always looking at me in the office a work. I deliberately did not return the favour, assuming there was zero likelihood of her being interested in me, or available, so there's no point showing interest back.I'm sure now (a few weeks later) she deliberately ignores me lol. Correct thing to do? :) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (4 August 2017):
 Do you think we women just can't get through the day without a man looking at us?
I think it's safe to say MOST people don't like it when someone appears to be deliberately ignoring them for no obvious reason.
I'm not sure what you were trying to accomplish here. Do you only acknowledge women you've taken a shine too? Everyone else doesn't exist?
It sounds as though you fancy her, but assume she wouldn't fancy you back so you pre-emptively punished her by ignoring her.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2017): Thanks everyone for your great answers, I agree with not getting involved with work colleagues, for all the mentioned readons. As I said I don't believe that she intends anything to come from the looks and glances, but she seems to want the attention back, like one of you said, as a bit of an 'ego boost'. Not only that I heard her talking to another colleague a couple of days ago about an upcoming holiday with her partner. I've learned from past experience the old saying that really rings true, about if something looks too good to be true, it's probably because it isn't :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2017): The proper conduct at work is polite, professional, and cordial.
Flirting can be misconstrued or twisted into sexual-harassment. A smile is just a smile, a glance is just a glance. If she ignores you for not flirting back, remain a gentleman.
If she suddenly turns rude. She is the one who crossed the line of professionalism. Either that, or you just read more into it than she intended; and you've offended her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2017): Please, if you have one working brain cell...stay out of office romances or using the workplace as a dating pool.
Don't mix business with pleasure. When they go sour, then you've got to see that person on a daily basis; and then it's no longer business, it's personal.
You're a mature man. I expect people in their 20's to ignore sensible rules in the workplace. You know better.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2017): Who cares?
I like when men don't pay attention. For a change.
It's a little too much sometimes.
You're at work. You're there to work. Not play some meaningless little staring games with women.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (2 August 2017):
 I'm with N91,
You are at work, not the local watering hole.
Just be professional and polite. If she wants to ignore you, let her.
And if things feel a little awkward consider how AWKWARD it would have been if you had started something with her that didn't pan out....
Keep romance out of the work place. That also gives YOU a place to relax from dating, courting, relationship and focus on other things. Such as... work.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2017): I think you're barking up the wrong tree with that pseudo-science. Anyway, if she's young, it's wise to stay away. Don't crap where you eat, so don't relationship-search where you work.
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A
female
reader, RubyBirtle  +, writes (2 August 2017):
Well provided you haven't behaved in a manner that's overtly rude and causes tension in the workplace...I can't see a problem.
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A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (2 August 2017):
 I think that it's best to keep things formal at work and it's always a good idea not to start anything in the office so yes, correct thing to do.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (2 August 2017):
 Does it matter?
You're at work, not looking for a relationship.
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A
female
reader, holeymoley  +, writes (2 August 2017):
 While I don't particularly agree with the first comment "that women hate it when men don't pay them attention" I do agree that you did the correct thing from being professionally smart. Flirty shenanigans in the workplace usually end up turning ugly and uncomfortable at some point. deliberately ignoring you, well thats a bit immature regardless :)
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A
female
reader, LionWisdom +, writes (2 August 2017):
You did the correct thing. Females do not like attention at work. You do realize you can get hit with sexual harassment or set up by that particular employee later on. I wouldn't look into it. People look the way they do at times.
Let me ask you, can you mind read someone? or know what all glances mean? You can't hah. The eye blinks quickly in seconds. I would ignore it.
Keep doing a great job at work, but never cross the line. Best Wishes to you!
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A
male
reader, judgedick  +, writes (2 August 2017):
 A high amount of relationships are formed at work, and if you think of it 50% of marriages end in divorce not to talk about a number of relationships that break up,
You don't really seem to be interested or drawn to this younger woman, So I feel you are best keeping it pro at the work place unless you fall head over heals for someone,
you can see there is a little strain at work today, imagine what it would be like if you got together and it did not work out, work could become too much for you and it is not easy to get new jobs
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