A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So, I'm currently in a long distance relationship (sort of - we're not wanting to call it a relationship quite yet), and it's going well.We've been talking daily since the end of October, and just after Christmas we agreed to commit to each other that we wouldn't have any other romantic interests and that we would look into pursuing a relationship.Not all those two months seemed as though we were heading towards a relationship (though most of it was). During a not so good period I paid a compliment to another girl online, who quickly decided I was the most wonderful man ever. It very quickly made me uncomfortable, but I didn't have the heart to upset her. Unfortunately, this combination of guilt preventing me from getting rid of her, and a bit of F*ING STUPIDITY on my my part led to us cybering. She then was away for a while, and during that time the girl I am 'with' became more and more fond of me, and a week after I'd last talked to the awkward girl, and I was finally able to break contact with her.At one level, it was only cybersex, and I wasn't in a relationship at the time, but....I'm still divided over whether to just put it to one side or what.
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christmas, cybersex, long distance, period Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): This isn't a silly online fling.
I've had those and I know the difference.
Anyway, I told her about it. All is well.
Signed,
OP
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (8 January 2013):
 you are LDR, you were not committed to each other. I don't see a problem.
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A
female
reader, ImmortalPrincess +, writes (8 January 2013):
 In my opinion, I don't believe you've cheated. Some others may disagree with me, but let me explain why.
You're in an online "relationship", sort of. You've never met this girl in person AND neither of you have considered yourselves in a relationship.
Now if you and this girl had an actual IRL relationship, away from the computer - then I would say that yes, cybering with another girl would be considered emotionally cheating - but from where I stand, you haven't done anything wrong, especially since you weren't even in a relationship at the time.
Now that the two of you have made a commitment to not pursue any other love interests - just go from there, and don't let it happen again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): Okay you need to stop living in lala land and start having relationships in the REAL world. I'm sorry by cybering, cybersex and online 'relationships' are just silly. You end up living your whole life on the computer. Start living a real life, get out there and actually meet people in person. And NO, you didn't cheat.
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