A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 months and whenever we make out we grind and lately hes been touchin my chest and ive touched him but through his pants or underware. Yesturday he tried to slide my hand down and i didnt know if he had his under wear on or not so i just stopped my hand. He tried once more than sorta flopped his hand over me. Then when he tried to get under my shirt and close to my chest i brought my elbows in and he retracted his hand. For the rest of the day we went to lunch with his parents and som fam and he didnt old my hand or anything like we usually do. Then we went to his gradmas house and played cards with more family. He didnt hold my hand or kiss me there either. Then theres this cousin of his and there really close and shes experienced and it bugged me so much cause he sat next to her at lunch and then i sat next to him. Then for cards i didnt really know how to play so i kept score and he partnered with her and whenever i see them near each other i want to take him away from her. Im hella not experienced. Ive kissed only one other boy and all the making out, grinding, touching thing is new to me. I think i made him mad or something. But when he took me home he hugged me and kissed me and then texted me good night sweet dreams like usual but i dont want this to come between us. Im really embarrased to tell him no and that i dont know what to do. what should i do? After dropping me off he went and played poker with firends and i bet he drank to so should i ask him whats wrong or hope he blew off the steam ast night. Im 17 and hes 22. we have parent permission.
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male
reader, Joker55 +, writes (13 May 2012):
Do what your comfortable with if this is new to you than it will take time to get used to I'm having some trouble with my girlfriend she doesn't seem to be ready for what I try to do with her but I'm willing to wait I can see his perspective it is frustrating to want to do these things when the other person doesn't want to but it takes time to get comfortable with this
A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (13 May 2012):
He has no right to be annoyed, you take things at a pace both partners are comfortable with. Having said that, there’s no evidence to suggest that he was, he might have just been enjoying the company of other family members, but you believed he was acting in the way he did out of annoyance because you were expecting him to be annoyed.I suggest that if you’re worried, you have a talk with him. Tell him how much he means to you, but that there are certain things you’re just not ready for yet but that you’ll tell him when you’re ready to take things further. Next time he does something you’re not comfortable with, just tell him you’re not ready for that yet rather than pull away and not talk about it. Finally, it’s important to tell him what things you do like as well as what things you don’t. Encourage him to do the same. It’s easy to just let things go but if you don’t know how each other is feeling you can get unnecessarily anxious. Have you thought that maybe he was distant with you because he believed that you were annoyed with him? Maybe by pulling away when you felt uncomfortable without saying why, he thought he’d upset you? Communication is the order of the day. Don’t try and guess how each other’s feeling, get used to talking about it with each other.I wish you all the very best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2012): Your no way at wrong here, i guess he isn't either.
You need to talk to him, tell him you are new at this and just want to take your time, tell him you really care for him and how much he means.
Also explain to him how special it is doing what you've already done.
Same time he was trying to make you jealous, possibly he felt guilty so texted you that, or he is trying to play mind games.
If the guy can't wait, he's not worth your time. It's as simple as that. With me i waited 6months then i took things further .
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