A
female
age
36-40,
*hoenix85
writes:hello. i love my boyfriend so much. we are not from the same country and we are both foreigners in the country we live. he doesnt have a family he grow up with facing every problem by himself. he realized that first time in his life someone is really loving him and supporting him. so he make me his whole world and he is phsicopatly jelous.he lost his job and some more bad things happened. i supported him and be next to him always. anyway i had to go back to my country for some time. and still he couldnt find a job, he is deeply in depresion. i called him everyday, send messages to cheer him up do everythin for him. try to find a job for him. i cried for his bad situation everyday, i just couldnt eat anything to think about him. and it has been 2 weeks i'm in my country, i just go out 3 times with my family in order to not making him feel bad while he is in depression, but whenever he feels bad he thinks that im doing something bad here. anyway last night he told me that it is better if we break up, normally i asked why? accourding to him it would be better for us like that. and he said that he can not do something for both of us right now, and some more things that break my heart too much. before i closed the phone i told him this is defenetly tha last talk (becouse before we break up 3 times but mostly for 2 hours) and explaind him how he made me feel bla bla bla, and the first time i turned off all my phones includs home phone. in the morning when i turned on, i saw 2 messages that he appoligize and say he did this thing becouse of stress bla bla. then he called from home phone when he heard my sister he didnt talk. but i think he might say sorry becouse he might think that i can give harm to myself. anyway i didnt answer any of his messsages or calls. then he texted that he is sure that im out with boys now, so thats why he wanted to break up. i didnt reply after he texted, babe im sorry. what should i do now? he really break my heart, but i love him. how can i be sure that he is trying to reach me, he really thinks that he made a mistake. please help me.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2008): hello.
it must be difficult for you both because you are far away from each other.
it worries me because you say that you broke up before? and 2 hours later everything was ok? - this is not a healthy relationship.
yes he loves you. but he does NOT treat you right.
he is depressed but he should not control you.
you went out 3 times with your family but he went out with the boys when he says he is depressed? that is unfair.
why can he go out? and you cant?
i think he is trying to control you- i understand you must love each other- but he cant break up with you for no reason. he goes out with the boys because he is upset? that makes no sense.
although this might hurt you- but i think you are better off without him. be headstrong and do not think with your heart.
i wish you luck and love with whatever you decide.
god bless
friend x
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