A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My daughter has just asked me advice but living in a different age cant help her really - so can you please?She has just returned from a holiday with a friend of hers. She met a young man who wanted sex but she held back which is very admirable and wise I think but the night before they cam home he lost his temper and in front of several people made it clear without actually spelling it out-she hadnt slept with him and made it clear he was unhappy about it. My daughter didnt want to show herself up so just sat there and said nothing. They all went on to the disco and he said angrily to her -coming-and then he stormed off, the next day a couple they had met said to him in a loud voice also in front of others "did you have a good night"-and he didnt say anything my daughter stood there again. I know I am of a different age group but surely this was not a nice thing to do-she thought they had got on well-did he get angry because he didnt have sex with her and felt he had wasted his time?My daughter is a bit upset becasue she didnt want and is not one of ten a penny-she is special-he has contacted her when he got home by e mail but has said he doesnt want a relationship so having read previous threads of similar stance-sounds to me as if he just wanted the one thing on holiday from ever he could??She really liked this guy and now is wishing she had slept with him but reading through other threads this doesnt seem to mean he would have contacted her again or saw her even if she had?? Cant people take things more slowly these days in some cases-she is a lovely girl and I am proud she held back isnt it nice to find someone like that-who doesnt sleep with all and sundry?? Please reassure a mother who has a very lovely daughter!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): You are an amazing mother and you should be very proud of your daughter.
that man deserves having his b*****ks chopped off!
A
female
reader, scrazy  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Your daughter deserves an award for what she did!
This guy is a Grade A ASSHOLE. If that was my daughter who came to me, I would've hunted him down and slapped some decency into him!
He probably thought she was easy when he met her, and felt that if he flirted enough and maybe bought her a drink or two, she would return the favour by letting him in her pants.
Obviously now that backfired and in his defense, he's being a complete jerk to her - how immature!
She was right not to sleep with him because in the end, he would've done the deed and then left right away without a word.
Tell her to keep strong and don't get in contact with this guy again; he's pathetic!
XO
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): The boy is an arsehole, whilst your daughter is the complete opposite. She's obviously got a sensible head on her shoulders.
Maybe he got pissed off that he'd bought her a couple of drinks and got nothing in return, which just goes to show exactly what professional bracket he'd put her in.
Good for her. You hear so much about youngsters having a different partner every night whilst on holiday, and it's very refreshing to hear of one that didn't!
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Your daughter did ABSOLUTELY RIGHT not to have slept with this PRAT. If he humiliated my daughter like that, I would have gave him a piece of my mind not to mention a slap around the face.
I hope your daughter is not beating herself up about it, she sounds like she has more class and morals in her little finger than that JERK has in his whole body.
Tell her from me and all the aunts that we are jolly well proud of her and you for raising such a lovely daughter. Dusky xx.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): Your daughter is wonderfull, you must be very proud. The boy just wanted sex, he's a bloody idiot.
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A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (16 July 2008):
 I think she was absolutely right not to sleep with him, and you must tell her so - she behaved beautifully, and looked after herself, and for damn sure is better off having not slept with him than if she had. For me, three main things stand out:
1) He treated her horribly, in public, and for that alone isn't worthy of being entrusted with her most tender feelings by sleeping with her
2) If she had slept with him, as you say, that wd be no guarantee of a relationship - and as he now says he doesn't want one, MUCH better not to have given in
3) If he doesn't want a relationship because she didn't give in, he isn't worth it - if he really wanted her he would have waited and respected her
4) You are totally right - it is no way good to sleep with any Tom, Dick (; ) or Harry. My daughter is only 3 months old but I will be keeping her very close to home, and teaching her to keep herself only for a person who truly deserves her!
I think your daughter deserves lots of love and praise for her actions, and reassurance that she'll find a nice guy, and that this guy really wasn't nice, however attractive he seemed. It is an essential lesson, and good that she learns it now - all that sparkles is not gold. She needs to hold out for the real thing, or her life could easily be made a lot less happy.
Give her a hug and tell her well done from me!
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (16 July 2008):
What an idiot he was. She was absolutely right not to have slept with him. He's proved that by being so obnoxious.
He probably annoyed because he's spent all this money on going all holiday and she had the audacity not to act like the slut that he wanted her to be. How dare she?!?!?!
It does seem that people going on holiday seem to lose all their morals and then expect everyone else to do the same. Your daughter is indeed very special and strong, and you are a great mum for not only bringing her up so well, but being so open that she can talk to you about these problems.
I know she is upset now but in a week she should be laughing about how incredibly stupid this man was. He is laughable.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, saltwater +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Disclaimer: This is my view...
He humiliated your daughter, now sends e-mails saying he doesn't want a relationship?
So...why is he contacting her then?
As I say it is my view but it sounds like he justs wants sex with your daughter; and your daughter was completely right not to do so. If you already haven't you should let her know that you are really proud of her and tell her that she did the right thing!!
Losing his temper on the night before she came home tells me he was hoping she would give in and have sex, but when it was clear to him that she wouldn't he got upset.
If I were you I would tell your daughter to forget him and seek a man who actually deserves her.
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (16 July 2008):
 oh hun she did right she didnt let out..it seems he was after one thing and no matter who he is he disrespected her in front of people and if he even cared he wouldnt of so she is better off without this guy..their are men out their who are willing to wait..or even if shes just holding back a little their are guys out their who arnt after one thing and she will get that guy just sometimes you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you get their -_- lol..if he was a decent guy he would of apologised but obviously he aint so he isnt worth the time of day..you should tell your daughter that she won and that she didnt sell her self short and that on its own is something she should hold her head high too..big hugs aphex hope that help x
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