A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I broke up about a week ago. He said he needed space and personal time. He asked me to take his things that he had left at my house because we lived together I took his things to him he told me that we both just needed time for our self to figure out what we want. He still has some things at my house that he told me to leave . Well since the break I've texted him and he keeps saying that he wants to be done and such. He ignores me most of the time. Everytime I ask him to come get the rest of his things he makes an excuse not to. Last night I just wanted answers from him. He wouldnt answer my questions I told him if he answered my questions he would never have to talk or see me again. I told him I would leave his stuff on my porch to pick up. He said he would come today and get the rest of his stuff he still hasn't showed up and I haven't heard from him. May night after I told him that he would never have to see or talk to me again he sent a text saying " Its pressure either way you look at it I can't provide anymore there's a lot I need to do mentally I can't be around you all" I have a two year old that he loved dearly he's never said that he couldn't be around her. Has he maybe found someomeone else and that's why he's acting this way and can't be around us or what?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (7 September 2013):
 Just leave him be. I am not sure if this is a break, or a final break up ( often "I need space" is a diplomatic way to say " it's over and done " sapating oneself unpleasant confrontations ) but , either way, if he needs space and personal time, then let him have space and personal time, surely it's not by breathing on his neck that you'll get him back !
It's HIS stuff, let him get it when he wants. Unless it's a grand piano or a sailboat, just put his personal belongings in a box in the attic, the garage, or under the bed...problem solved. Your bf is not stupid, he got it that you are fretting about his stuff because you want another excuse to meet up in person , which it is exactly what he does not want to do- so, in your own interest , stop tring to force him.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2013): Possibly, maybe a Yes or a No.
But whatever, once a man ask for a space, it usually means Its Over.
You need to Move on and accept his not for you. it hurts but that's the way it is. its just hard in the beginning.
But you'll be ok.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (7 September 2013):
When someone asks for space it can make you feel like you can't give them any or they'll leave. But the truth is if you don't give him space he's gone for sure. Just leave him alone and try to move on with your life.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (7 September 2013):
I don't think the way he's acting would indicate that he's found someone else. He sounds like someone that broke up because he wanted space and personal time and you're not giving him any of that. Is giving him back his stuff really that important to you? Probably not, I assume it's so you can see him. Either keep his stuff and he'll get it when he's ready, or just tell him to get his stuff or you'll throw it away.
Just give him some time and space. If it's meant to be, it'll be. But if you keep pressuring him, it's going to keep driving him away.
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