A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:1st post. Here goes.....(deep breath)So in 2007 I registered on a website to meet women of my age.A random girl gave me a glowing (yet conservative) compliment and I proceeded to converse with her based on that.We spent ridiculous amounts of time chatting and messaging into the morning, even on school nights. The conversations moved from that site to MySpace then to e-mails and we had (have?) tons in common and established some kind of feelings for one another. Then her mother locked her out of the internet because of me.I spent the next few years searching for her online (at random intervals) to no avail and fell into a depression of sorts.Last year she found me on Twitter by way of a post in "Twitter After Dark" and proceeded to stalk my page to verify my identity (that's how she told it) after which she sent a message saying "remeber me?""HELL YES, I remember you!" was the gist of my response and we started talking again like old times. Throughout these constant conversations I've found that we share the same sense of humor, traumatizing events and even a favorite video game franchise! You can imagine how devastated I was to learn that she had a boyfriend. After that shocking reveal (she didn't tell me, he just kind of interrupted our FB Chat) we've talked less and less. On my end it's simply because I don't want to disrespect her relationship and I hope/suspect that as her reasoning as well. He doesn't like me and her talking, but she consistently defies this and I believe it's because she feels something for me that her relationship won't let her say. It also doesn't help that I'm convinced that she is THE ideal woman for me. Now I plan on seeing her and she's completely on board despite his not caring for me. What does it all mean?Do you believe that fate brought us back into each others' lives for a reason? Is it possible that our past makes me the more desired man? Why would she risk her relationship like this for someone she's never met?Does anyone else think this means ANYTHING?
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@Spinnaker Off-topic: You may be cynical (as am I in most cases) but you are funny. Friends? Maybe?
Anywho, I'll be careful and try to assess any situation that may get.....out of hand. I only hope that she's not blind to the ramifications of her (my?) actions.
Here's some extra info that may help: She met me first, we had feelings and he was (is) her first boyfriend. Does this info help?
A
male
reader, spinnaker +, writes (6 June 2011):
 Just be careful my friend.
I read in your original post: He doesn't like me and her talking, but she consistently defies this and I believe it's because she feels something for me that her relationship won't let her say.
She is hanging on to this man for a reason - you provide a novel refreshment to her situation. I do not believe she is doing this maliciously - she is just not seeing the ramifications of her actions.
I have been down this same road before and I was only around insofar as the crush whom I hadn't seen in 10 years patched up her relationship.
I was the back up guy because she and her fiance (which I did not know he was her fiance at the time - she took the ring off when I was around) were on the rocks and she did not want to be alone.
Now that I look back on it, in any scenario there was only the remotest chance anything would have worked out simply due to the tense circumstances that brought us together. I was the young white night helping the distressed damsel - forgive my cynicism but that stuff only works out in Disney movies - and they never show you the epilogue "5 years later.".
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@Spinnaker: I don't think she's speaking with me to be spiteful or anything like that.
She's told HIM about US talking and even talked about me before we started communicating again, which I found endearing. It's also pretty exhaustive to think she'd been trolling my life for 4 years straight and would be devastating seeing as I consider her a friend.
As Aunty Susie said, I think all questions will be answered when we finally meet.
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A
female
reader, Aunty Susie  +, writes (6 June 2011):
 I guess you won't know until you meet up with her. You may find that you don't have the same feelings when do actually meet. It has happened before. The physical chemistry might be there. It all might be just fantasy. She should respect her relationship with her boyfriend, as you have been doing.
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A
male
reader, spinnaker +, writes (6 June 2011):
One might say it is fate that the IPOD wearing jaywalker gets hit by the bus too.
I wouldn't read too much into the stars on this one , my friend, because (from experience) it sounds like she is using you as leverage against her boyfriend.
Once whatever issue they are batting around gets resolved you will be left next to a mile marker on the interstate. Thats the best you can hope for because if this guy has a short fuse, you better make sure your dental insurance is paid up.
No matter how it feels you are a pawn at this stage wheither she is intending it or not. Keep civil but keep distant because either way (once again from experience) this will turn out not in your favor.
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