A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:alright... so afew months ago i met my "dream guy" (like seriously, the guy who i've been hoping to find for like ever) and of course i had sex with him on the 3rd date. I know ur supposed to hold out, but i didn't. since then we went out afew more times and things were awesome!!!! Eventually the "dating game" starts where he'll txt me and I won't reply and visa versa. It's been a month since we've seen eachother, he was supposed to come over last night but i blew him off. (last time we were gonna hang out he blew me off) We were both really into eachother at 1st, and im still interested, how do i get things back to the way they were when we 1st started hanging out 3 months ago. How do I get the ball back in my court and have him into me again. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2009): Ok, the last answer was extremely condescending so I'm going to try to be of more help. Speaking from my own experiences, I will have to agree that you shouldn't be complicating your life with sex...I assure you you'll regret it later..I did. On the other hand I met my dream guy when I was 12 and almost married him. You're not too young to understand what it means to care about another person and you're not too young to know what you want. You may change your mind several times in your life, but that's life. So anyone who says you're too young...F them.OK, first off, whether you're 13 or 30, you slept with this guy WAY too soon. Guys are exactly the same no matter what age, and very basic. They want sex...once they get it, game over. You've heard about how guys are in it for the thrill of the chase...they'll chase you until you either have sex or you show there's more worth chasing than your body. Since you've already slept with him, it's going to be hard to bounce back. Don't be surprised if he slowly continues to be more distant. Don't let it bother you. You need to hang out with other guys and your girlfriends. Be unavailable without blowing this guy off. He thinks he can have you anytime he wants...you need to prove otherwise. No more sex until he's committed to being your boyfriend... Don't be a booty call girl. Guy are about instant gratification...they only stick around for what feels good. So when he's around you, make it a positive experience for him without having sex, and then while you're busy being unavailable he'll crave those positive feelings again. Be addicting and unattainable! Now in all likelihood your dream guy probably isn't going to be your future husband. I don't think you're too immature, but guys just don't think that way until much later in life. Even in their 30s most of them are still just trying to get laid without a commitment. I'll never say never, this guy may be an exception to the rule...but realistically odds are not in your favor. However, just enjoy the relationship for what it is for however long it lasts...maybe it's forever, maybe it isn't. Don't say or do anything you'll regret later. You have your whole life to flirt and play with boys...enjoy it! In the long run, guys are just another form of entertainment and your best friends will come to mean the more to you than anything in the world.Good luck!
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (25 August 2009):
 Your 13-15 and have already had sex with this guy who is apparently your "dream guy"?! Wow, things have changed since I was that age!
Well for a start these "games" that you are playing happen because you are both too young to be in a real relationship. When you are too immature to handle real emotions and feelings for another person you play games to try and make them think that you dont like them as much as you really do in order to protect yourself.
This guy is not your dream guy, you are too young to know what you want in your own life let alone what you want from a man! Just chill out a bit - if you like this guy then send him a text saying "I really like you, do you want to meet up on xxxxx".
Stop playing games with each other and grow up a bit - you are still only a teenager and you should just be having fun not worrying about whether you have met the right guy yet. I would bet you all the money in the world that this guy is not the right guy for you and in a few years time you will look back on this as a silly crush! People change as they get older, and when you hit 18 loads of things will change in your life - you might go to college, get a job......so much changes you cannot realistically expect to spend the rest of your life with someone you met when you were in your early teens.
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