A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well am 19 stil with my 1st boyfriend (from 16 and he was 19) we had our ups and down..he was cheating on me while i was loyal to him...we broke up after a year then i met another guy we fell in love ......then my ex came back to me and we dated till today so currently am dating two guys at the same time and i love both of them but i usualy fight with my first boyfriend and this year its our forth year.... With the other one this year its our second year.......so my first boyfriend wants to pay lobola for me but i cant hurt the other one because he's not cheating on me and i cant hurt the first one too....please help
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 March 2013):
 Ok I had to look up Lobola:
Lobolo or Lobola in Zulu, Xhosa and Ndebele (Mahadi in Sesotho, Roora in Shona, and Magadi in Northern Sotho), sometimes translated as bride price, is a traditional Southern African custom whereby the man pays the family of his fiancée for her hand in marriage. (Compare with the European dowry custom where the woman brings assets.) The custom is aimed at bringing the two families together, fostering mutual respect, and indicating that the man is capable of supporting his wife financially.
Do these boyfriends know you are seeing the other one? if not you are lying and cheating both of them.... not good.
I think if you can't choose either of them, choose neither... go off by yourself and figure out who you are and what you want.
If they don't know about each other, you are a liar and a cheater and you need to tell both of them the truth. I'm sure that will solve your problem.
A
female
reader, Sexy Honest Kay Lady +, writes (26 March 2013):
 Well your problem was taking your ex back and it is sayed that if you fall for two people at the same time take the second one because if you really loved the first one you would not have felt for the other one so stick with the second one because he has not ever cheated on you unlike the the first one....goodluck follow ur heart.
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