A
female
age
30-35,
*adeybaby
writes:Hey I’m 16 and nearly 17 and just come out of a relationship. The guy I was with was amazing, I wasn’t with him long (only 5 weeks) but me and him really clicked together, and on our second date he asked me to be his girlfriend. He’s 20 got a decent job etc but we only got to see each other once a week. After the third week of me and him being together, he asked if he could meet my parents, which I was pretty shocked about. He wanted to ask my dad if it was ok about me and him being together-get his approval etc.Anyways my family approved-they love him said that he seems respectable and a good guy.I was so chuffed, and everything was going amazingly well between me and him. But then last week, whilst I was on msn. He broke up with me. This is what he said in an msn conversation:I said: christian :DI said: i don't get why your ignoring me? He said: im not ignoring you? jus cuz i aint spoke to u in 2days probly means im busy, which i am. i am sorry but its not in my control I said: What am I supposed to think if you don’t text me back or speak to me? So I just assumed you were ignoring me. I was worried about you. I’m sorry your busy, I didn’t know that. Want me leave you alone for awhile, like until your not busy anymore? He said: ur supposed to think hes not txting me back his brother must still have his phone... and hes not talking much because he must be busy; because when hes not busy he always talks to me. i think this is a bad time for both of us and u need to consentrate on ur exams to get into uni and i need to focus on my work, get thru my driving test and other stuff I said: Ok fair enough, so what do you want me to do? He said: i want you to get good test scores. and you cant do that if ur always thinking about me and why im not talking to you. i cant be happy knowing that. and ill feel even worse if u dnt get the test score u need. my grandad passed away sunday night and his funeral is on friday. im not goin to be good company and im busy with so many thinngs and it dusnt look like im goin to get paid untill the 24th of this month that too long and not fair on you tht i dnt get to see you. think maybe we shud break up : ( at least for now mabye see wa happens in summer time. you kno i dnt want to do this but its important u do well at college and i get to see u more often not once a week I said: Ok I understand. I don’t want to break up, but I agree with you. Im sorry about your grandad hun. Will you be ok? He said: yea ill be ffine i knew it was cuming my my nan passed last year he stopped eating. but i think its better this way. if i continue to talk to you while u revising/ doin exam ur still be thinkin of me and i you so i think its best if we dint i really want you to get into uni :(I said: I’m glad you’ll be ok. Promise me you will? Its just I worry about you. And thanks for understanding about my education sweet of you. So you think its best if we don’t talk at all? He said: yeh past experiences lead me to beleive that if we do continue we'll keep thinking about one another. il be fine i promise just ace ur exams I said: Okies so do you want me to like block you etc? delete your number? that’s is, after that last message I sent him I didn’t get a reply off him, he blocked me and hasn’t spoke with me for 2 weeks. I really miss him and I really like him too. But I understand why he broke up with me etc.but I confined in my friends about what happened (most of them being males) and they said that it sounds like he was letting me down gentlyI don’t know what to think, at first I had hope that there was a chance of me and him getting together but now, after hearing my friends opinions I’m confused and hurt.Any ideas to what’s going on?Would be deeply appreciated …
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female
reader, Briana969  +, writes (19 May 2009):
Hiya, dont let it bog you down too much hun there will be plenty of other guys out there, epsecially when you ace your exams and get into university, believe me lol. He doesnt seem that bothered about talking to you, take up on that and just focus on your life for the time being, get your exams out of the way and who knows. if he does contact you back in the summer you may feel differently.
It does seem your male friends are right though, in the respect that he was letting you down gently, giving you a false sense of hope that there is a chance when infact he wasnt going to bother, ifhe was really keen on you he would have popped you a message by now. I'm sure there will be a guy out there who wont be able to get enough of you. best of luck
A
female
reader, Scarlettxx  +, writes (18 May 2009):
 Hun, I've been through this myself & I tell you most other girls have been too.
In my opinion I believe he is just letting you down with an excuse, now fair enough his grandad died & it's probably a stressful time for him but I still think he's used an excuse to let you down gently. He could honestly think that you're in two different stages of your life & he doesn't know what to make of it so he broke up with you.
Sometimes these things just seem to happen from obscurity and you're left baffled. It's happened to me many a time but you've got to think that you're lucky as well because he could have broken up with you months down the line when you were really in love with him. Thank your lucky stars it happened now when the feelings may not have been that strong because it was very early in the relationship.
See how things develop over the coming months but don't pin your hopes on anything hun. Get out there & concentrate on your exams & look forward to Uni. At the end of the day your education is way more important than some bloke.
Just take it that at this moment in time he's not the person you're meant to be with.
Good luck with your exams :)
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