A
female
age
26-29,
*re_bre01
writes:Ok so my cousin and I are on very bad terms right now. We are both females. To make a very long story short, I invited her over my house that night so that we can have a little sleep over or whatever. But someone facetimed me and while I was on ft she kept buggin me. And of course I told her to stop. But she kept going. Then she hits my little brother, because he puts his hand up at her face. Keep in mind she's 16 and he's 5.So of course I say something, and tell her to stop. But she says I can do whatever I want to do to him and hits him again. so I gets up, then she gets up and push me, so I push back. Then she punches me in the nose. So at that point im annoyed and we start fighting. I just want to know am I wrong? Should I take responsiblity? The thing is we stopped talking for like a month. and after my grandma gave me a whole lesson about her. I just felt the need to call her and say sorry or whatever. and I told her sorry she acted as if she didn't care. like what I just said didn't mean anything. I just feel like what I did was a waste of time. She said she was sorry too but her body langue said it all. anyways my question is should I just leave her alone because she is family. or should I try to reach out to her more.but at the same time I feel like she should talk to me, because she did start the fight not me.hopefully I wrote this clearly so that you all can understand. Because I really need feedback.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2015): I think you do owe your cousin an apology for sure! You invited her over for a sleep-over, and then proceeded to ignore her and go on your facetime? That is not acceptable. It was wrong of her to hit your little brother, but that is where your parents should step in, not a time for you to start a fistfight with her. This also has nothing to do with the fact that you behaved badly to her first. I am not trying to excuse her bad behavior, as she also participated in the fight, but we cannot control another person's behavior, only our own.You should take responsibility for your own bad behavior and apologize for real. I know last time you told her "sorry" you say she didn't care, but I bet it was because your apology was insincere. Give it one more try. Give her a true apology. If after that, she still does not want to associate with you, then that is her decision and you cannot do anything about that. But you do need to open that door back up to be friends again, since your behavior is what started this mess. I hope you and your cousin can find friendship again.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (22 July 2015):
 Family or not, there is NO way I'd call and apologize. A 16 year old hitting a 5 year old? NOT acceptable AT ALL. Nope, not one bit.
But next time you invite someone over, GET OFF your freaking "tech" and HANG out with the person you invited over. The other person can wait.
As for this cousin I'd let her stew. If she GROWS up a tad and call to say sorry, THEN I would talk to her. But no, I wouldn't reach out to her.
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