| A
female
,
*xJoxx
writes: I've been going out with my boyfriend Ryan for 4 years now. Last month I found a love-bite on his back and it started to give me doubts to whether he has been faithful or not. I confronted him about it and he said he didn't know how it got there and that it just must be a mark. However I find it hard to believe that a mark resembling a love bite would just suddenly appear for no apparent reason. As this gave me doubts I checked his phone bill and discovered that hes been using the internet on his phone everyday and raking up bills of £100 on internet usage alone. We see each other everyday although we do not live together. Every time he has been on the internet is first thing in the morning and last thing at night, the times I'm not around. Again I asked him about it and he said he had been looking at porn and football scores even though there wasn't any football on last month. I just find it all suspicious, looking at porn every day is a bit much even for a guy. I don't know what to believe, I don't want to be hurt. He thinks I'm being paranoid and that its all totally innocent. Should I believe this? Can there be a logical and innocent explanation for developing a love bite?
View related questions:
porn, the internet Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (16 June 2006):
 You should trust your intuition. You have been with this man 4 years, you know him well enough to judge. Do you feel a flow of attention away from you? Is he mentally 'elsewhere' a lot more than before? Has his sexual behaviour changed towards you... is he wanting a lot less or more sex? Or doing slightly different things? Is he paying more attention to his appearance that before? Or perhaps has found several new interests? All of these are indicators that there could be someone else.
However you have seen his phone bill, so you probably would have spotted a lot of calls or text messages to someone you didn't know if he was being unfaithful. It sounds like you didn't, so your fears may be unfounded.
You have voiced your concerns to him. It is up to him to make you feel you can trust him by behaving in ways that build your trust back up.
A
female
reader, Smiler +, writes (16 June 2006):
 Hey Sweetie
Well honestly i think your quite right to be suspect him that whole love bite thing for a start! marks don't just randomly appear from nowhere let alone a bite mark and on his back... quite rightly you had doubts me i would gone up the wall seriosly i could not have believed another word out of his mouth, then the next thing the excessive internet usage..hhhmmm well most men at one time and another will look at porn on the net but not usually to the extent of that much money.... i think there is a big problem here just waiting to explode,ur very right to have doubts about him so would i.. If i was you i would literally sit him down tell him straight exactly what your thinking and feeling and that its really hurting you getting you down etc.. and tell him he need to sort things out with the porn and internet usage cause sure its uo to him what he does but if he knows how it effecting you and making you feel if he loves you he will change , me personally it sounds like he's playing away from home with the love bite thing follow your instincts here trust your own judgements and make your own conclusions, you'll know deep down what you should say to him?
I hope my advice was able to help you out with your situation sweetie and good luck with this... if you ever need a friend or a chat or just more advice don't hesitate to email me sweetie, I would love to hear from you again and know how you got on... Remember i'm always here for you anytime ok
You Take Care Sweetie X
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2006): Are you sure it is a love bite though? A love bite is effectively a bruise, and it is a bit strange to have one on his back. They only last 3 - 5 days any way, has your boyfriends gone already?
As for the Internet, I sometimes spend ageeeeeeeeees on the Internet, and if someone was to ask me to account for my time, I probably couldn't. Not because I am hiding any thing but it is very easy to waste large amounts of time surfing the internet!
We know next to nothing about your relationship, you or your boyfriend, so it would be impossible to answer whether or not he is cheating on you.
Should you believe him though - well - I don't think there is any hard evidence there that he is cheating and second - could there be a logical and innocent explanation for is mark (that resembles a love bite) - Yes - definitely.
...............................
|
