A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I have been dating this guy for 3 months and things seem to be going very good. Except that his ex is still in his life he says they are just friends. We hardly fight and he says that when he he's with me that he doesn't think about anything or anyone else. We haven't had sex and he says that he loves me but he's also said he loves his ex to.him and hisEx didn't have a good relationship at all.we started dating before they even broke up. Any way he's a cancer and I'm a Leo and and everyone says the two is perfect for each other, we also have the same last name but we aren't related. Could I have found the right guy?
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2014): 18-21 but this seems more like a text coming from a teenager with a crush.
At this point of your life, you do not know how to make those kind of decisions. This proves it. You just said he broke up with his Ex and you two started dating before they broke up.
1. That's cheating and 2. It makes you look like a rebound
Does that sound like he's the right one for you?
You are at a point in your life where you are transitioning into your own person. You are growing into adulthood, trying to make decisions that will greatly affect your life. Jumping into a relationship every time you think it's love is going to ruin you.
A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (15 August 2014):
In my opinion, if I fight with someone after only 3 months it is NOT the right person. Been with my husband for five years and we never "fight", and time between disagreements/minor arguments is 6-9 months. Just my opinion.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (15 August 2014):
 Ok, sorry to be mean but lets do a little reality check here.
1. He was still dating someone else and you started seeing him. Definitely not good. That means he'll cheat. And like the saying goes "If he cheats with you, he'll cheat on you."
2. You could easily be a rebound. Those type of relationships don't end too well. Be sure he cares about you and not just to have a warm body going from one relationship to another.
3. 3 months and you're fighting??? The first 6 months to a year of a relationship should be the honeymoon period. What are you fighting about already?
4. Is his ex really an ex? Is it possible he could back to her?
5. I would never ever assume in just 3 months that someone is "the one". That's WAAAAY to soon. You don't know him. Give a year at least before thinking that way.
You're trying too hard to jump the gun. Do you "love being in love"?? Take off the rose colored glasses and see things for what they are. Don't let the stars in your eyes cloud your vision.
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A
male
reader, Mark1978  +, writes (15 August 2014):
 Enjoy what you have and enjoy the relationship for what I is, but don't read too much into star signs, same names and so forth as its both early days in the relationship and you are both still very young.
Although some people look for Mr Right or "The One", its not as simple as that. At your stage in life things change a lot very quickly: changes in our outlook on life, experience, ambitions, etc can quickly make couples drift apart as they become fully fledged adults with differing needs and feelings. What you want from a relationship and partner NOW may not be the same as what you will want in the future and the two of you are still maturing an developing and may well become very different in the coming months and years. So after 3 months at a young age its hard to tell if you will be together into the long term.
Your relationship started while your BF was still with his EX so that does suggest a rebound. Also you say your BF has told you he loves his ex as well as you? Not a good sign. Instead of looking into star signs you should be reading the signs that suggest he is conflicted and still very much into his ex. He says when he is with you he doesn't think about any one else, but what about when you are apart?
Give it time but hold back and don't get too close as I do feel he is still emotionally involved with his ex GF.
Mark
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (15 August 2014):
 Don't have sex with until his ex is totally out of the picture. Time will tell if he's really the one. He sounds pretty conflicted to me, he told you he still loves his ex??? Definitely take this slowly.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (15 August 2014):
 Before we can weigh in on him being the right guy, I have to ask, what are you fighting about? You've only been dating for 3 months, what is causing the arguments?
I worry about a volatile relationship that started before he even ended his other relationship. Not a sign of a stand up guy with integrity, ya know?
So, what are you fighting about?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2014): Only time will tell. I think you have to let things happen slowly because people who recently broke-up with someone else can be a little unreliable. Human feelings need time to heal or to change. You have to be sure you're not a rebound romance.
So hold back your feelings and give them a little at a time. That will protect you from falling too hard too soon.
Make a list in your head and check off the boxes as you go.
If he checks every good box, he just might be. You still have to be sure his ex is really an ex. It has only been 3 months.
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