A
male
age
51-59,
*ohnny c 66
writes:my Girl friend wrot me thisand I was wondering if we are getting back together? these emails are in the order they were received.Dear Johnny,First of all by you just admitting to all this without rationalizations, excuses or divorce talk has already helped my anger toward you. Thank you. That doesn't mean it's all gone and it doesn't mean I'm ready to jump into anything with you. I don't have any desire to start over with you yet John. It's taken a toll on me and my emotions big time. I waited and waited for all this shit. I told you I was unhappy and things continued. I told you the only way to save us was for me to get my space and time and be down here while I get my shit together and you get your shit together. That never happened. Us breaking up was inevitable with the past we had.Yes we had great times, yes we have amazing chemistry, passion and love but John, all that gets buried when anger takes over.I'm angry at a lot of things.The pastThe liesThe fightsThe financesThe irresponsibilityThe lack of communicationThe lack of understanding me and my needsThe criticism of my life and my choicesThe choices you madeAnd the fact you did take me for granted.I can't promise anything of our future, to do so would be unfair to both you and me. I need to figure out what I want in life and the things I have been struggleing with for years. I'm not perfect, never claimed to be but I feel like there were way to many issues and I deserved better.As far as me dating other people, I have zero interest John. I hope you know what I felt for you was sincere and I meant every word but every promise you broke, every day I waited for things to change and every lie/deception you got caught in chipped away at that. Then you would apologize, cry, tell me things would change and I would believe you and trust you and do it ALL OVER AGAIN. This time I can't. I suggest that with your masshealth you see a shrink. See it for yourself and everything you have gone through and are going through. It's free, one hour a week does wonders. It will also show me you are attempting to better yourself and by you bettering yourself WITHOUT me pushing or helping is a HUGE element. I want to be taken care of, I deserve it and I will get it. You can only take care of someone if you take care of yourself first.I have missed you and I will miss you. I am proud of you for taking initiative and getting things together. When we meet for dinner and you tell me things that are going on I can promise by then I will leave the past behind us but I can't promise anything else.Please be safe, stay strong and know that this girl wouldn't be emailing you if she didn't care about you or us.Love*****Then we emailed each other this,Hi Johnny, Just wanted to say hi and see how you are. Things here are ok. I have nothing to do and all day to do it every day. It sucks and I’m going insane. I sent resumes out but there aren’t too many places hiring. Gunner has a bad skin infection and diarrhea – he’s on meds but it seems to maybe make it worse. Awesome. Other than that same shit. Hope you are well and staying warm. It’s really nice here (weather wise) Have a good day/night*****then i sent this,Hi ***** Thanks for saying hi, im so busy running from lawyers offices to doctors offices and I joined my friend pauls gym and been pumping hard getting ready to go now,next week is going to be so crazy I have appointments everyday then court on tuesday and finally the divorce on friday, my friends are throwing me a party on saturday or I think bringing me out,I dont even talk to bobby or david anymore its almost like their snobs now but I dont care. Im going insane here too, I dont want to be here, I seen my kids they actually love their new parents and home david says when he does get out he wants to come live with me where ever that may be when he gets out. Hope Gunner feels better and stops the diarrhea. Im invited out this weekend to the salem halloween madness parties and wish you were by my side, Im trying to hold hope that we may survive this break up. I miss you. You just texted me that you grabbed $4000 I m happy and relieved !! Are you going to still sell them machines now?? And I was interested in why you texted me some one told you that you were still in love and it makes me wonder who would of said that. Plus I would of preffered that you texted me that you were still in love, but i know your walls are up and you are eliminating your feelings for me, I do love you Nadia. good luck LoveJohnnyHi Johnny, You don’t have to thank me. I’m sorry to hear about Bobby and David. I wonder why? That’s weird. They probably feel abandoned. That’s great about the kids. Did you see all of them? Did you meet the foster parents? So who are you hanging out with? Your bikee friends? (knew it!!!) ha ha. Things here are better now that I got paid but I don’t know, it sucks because, as you know, my friends are guys. When you go out with guys and they know they aren’t going to get anywhere, after a while they pick up chicks and then I’m forgotten, happens that way all the time.. ha ha.. it sucks but it’s what I have. Last night I met one of the girlfriends and she was a tad snooty.. Girls are always tougher than guys to get along with. I miss Wendy but I’m not going to chase her, I feel pathetic. All the guys do is scream at the college football games and I just sit there, but I get so crazy with being home ALL DAY and ALL night I’d rather watch them scream at gay football and people watch then be at home anymore. As far as the text last night it went like this… I was out with the same crowd and it’s SO obvious that I’m just a friend that some random guy at the bar tried to pick me up when I walked past him. When I blew him off and joined my friends again Greg asked. “What’s wrong with that guy?” I said, “Nothing, I am just not interested in anyone or anything right now.” And he said “Sounds to me like you are still in love with John.” That was it, the whole story. You’re right, my wall is still up though. What are you going to be for Halloween? I hope you have fun. I’m going to be Rogue, she’s an XMen. She has mind control. Not sure what I’m doing but whatever. I’m supposed to talk to Jim next week about working there, it is SUPPOSED to be more organized and there will be changes but I am only 1 of 3 that are welcome to work for them.. We’ll see. I don’t know Great that you’re working out and doing all that shit and I’m sorry you’re miserable. Soon it will be over. Well, I hope you have fun tonight and tomorrow night with your bikee friends. Be safe. Love*****Then I sent this,Im not hanging with bikees ever again!! Please stop always assuming negative thoughts,Im taking care of my divorce, It has been every day lawyers and doctors,Im hanging with some friends of mine that are married and one of them promotes bands and theres tons going on in salem this weekend,actually dave and bobby are going to meet me tonight,im sure you will meet a guy its obvious that you are lonely and horny plus being out all the time ,I hope you really do meet the man of your dreams, but you still do love me!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and I still do want to meet for dinner !!! If thats even a thought anymore.and she returned this,You’re so gay. I JUST SAID I WASN’T INTERESTED IN ANYONE OR ANYTHING YOU THICK SKULLED MOTHER F*****.. ha ha.. We will meet for dinner and sparks will fly again I’m sure. Goodnight my love. Have fun. and i s,ent thisYou behave you beautiful, sexy girl your prince in shining armor never lost one spark and never will. Goodnight to you too and have funI love you and miss you lottsJohnny thats all folks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, happy24birthday +, writes (2 November 2009):
 She misses you because she can't find anyone else she clicks with as well as she does with you. She's lonely. My first thought is NOT that she wants to get back together; however, there's still hope since she's still talking to you.
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