A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:This is a long one but I can't express my confusion anymore concisely: I really don't get this girl. (We're both in our mid twenties) It's been a roller coaster of yes and no signals. I'm left confused and heartbroken.I liked her 3 years ago. She liked me. If it sounds simple, it wasn't. She invites me over for this fantastic dinner she spent a really long time preparing which is a HUGE SIGNAL(!!!) but then reacts coldly to my advances, talks negatively about me to others on our sports team and even shies away from my hand when we take a dance class! I guessed she really wasn't interested after all...I moved on. (Would you believe that she actually was extremely interested back then?)Now, 3 years later, here's the horrible roller coaster that led this horrible Sunday:- She takes me up on my offer to go out for a friendly lunch where we talk about our relationships (she's been single these 3 years)- We go do an activity the following evening and there's a lot of eye flirting. I see an open door- (YES Signal) She agrees to go on a dance date the following night- (NO Signal) She shies away from my hand (AGAIN!) like first year and I'm confused but thinking back on experience and decide that she must have simply been inexperienced this whole time.- (YES Signal) She asks me out to the movies the next day- (NO Signal) She back away and says she's actually busy all week- (NO Signal) She refuses my invitation to go to the theater- (YES Signal) A week later, she invites me to the movies and accepts my invitation to go to the Opera- (YES Signal) We have a great time at the Opera and she let's me put my put my arm around her seat back- (YES Signal) She falls forward into my arms and onto my chest every she laughed when we danced later on- (YES Signal) She invites me to the movies the next night- (???) She leans into my seat but when I put my around her she tells me she doesn't think that's a good idea- (???) We have a very candid talk in the car about how we're both really interested in each other and both really attracted to each other (???) but that she's really confused and needs some time because she's still got some baggage from the bf she broke up with over 3 years- (???) She tells me she needs time- (???) She kisses me (???!!!)- (???) She tells me she needs time- (Ouch) I send her flowers in the morning and she emails me that she wants to be friends and that's allWhat is up with this girl??? I'm at a lost as to what I could even say tomorrow during our classes. I am so confused. I'm going out of my mind. Do you have any advice? Is this my last crash and burn, should I even keep trying at this?
View related questions:
broke up, flirt, flowers, heartbroken, kissing Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks man that really helped
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2009): dude leave her man, give her space but dont let her know your giving her space, JUST DONT SAY ANYTHING. I been in this exact same position, you know what it is? THERE SCARED OF BEING HURT, THEY DONT WANT TO COMMIT OR FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU BECUASE THEY ARE ThINKING YOU WILL LEAVE THEM/ HURT THEM. How do i know this? because i went through this exact same situation, it took me years to gain my wifes trust.. eventualy we fell in love. dude all im saying is.. give her time, girls like this take time.. and if your willing to wait.. it will be worth it... because what they give back to you in the end is unconditional love.
GOODLUCK BROTHER!
TIM
...............................
|
