A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:There is this guy I am interested in. He told me he misses me and stuff too. We met at this party couple months back! He lives in the east coast, and I in the west coast, and now he is visiting here for work. We had dinner the first day he was here, but after that he seems to be pretty much occupied with his colleagues and friends here. He already has plans for the weekend and only has few nights open to hang out with me. He tell me that those dinners and gathering were already pre-planned so he can't just not show up. BUT if he does really like me, then why not try to spend more time with me instead? Its really confusing because he calls me and tells me how much he misses me, but he has plans on major weekends, and just wants to see me on random week nights while he is here which makes me confused. I mean why not invite me to the dinner too? I don't understand what wrong with inviting someone you like to attend a casual dinner with the colleagues! Please write comments whether guy/or girl. All thoughts appreciated because I am pretty confused at this point!!! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Sister Love +, writes (7 September 2008):
colleagues? Are you sure honey that the meetings are with colleagues or a female??? That is your first question. Why do you allow yourself to be taken for granted and be seen only on random nights...nights... hello0i0i0! This guy sounds like a player to me. If he were serious, he would invite you along unless you are just a possible booty call; are you? I don't want to assume. I have learned, the best way to keep a man after you is never give up the booty. A man loves a challenge. If you haven't given it up and should lose him, well, you have still won! I hope this helped.
Sista Love
A
female
reader, Ember13 +, writes (7 September 2008):
I think you're stressing out a bit too much over this. He already had plans before he met you. It's unprofessional and rude to cancel on them. Think what if he had plans with you, well made in advance, and then cancelled on you. I don't think you'd like that. If anyone did that to you, that's just mean.As to why he doesn't have anymore time to spend with you, it seems to me that he's trying his best to fit you in his busy schedule. Time is finite and he already has plans, he can only fit you in when he has space. As to why he doesn't invite you to dinner with his colleagues there could be multiple reasons. Maybe it's work related and if so, that'd be unprofessional to invite you to something like that. Maybe it's with friends and having you there would add a different dynamic. He'll act differently with his friends if you were there. Some people don't like to mix groups like that.I think you're making too much of this. Just try to spend time with him when he's free and make the most of it. You can't expect someone to drop all of their plans and spend all of his time with you. I wouldn't expect that of someone and I wouldn't do that for someone either.
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