A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm going to try to say this as best as i can, so bare with me.Okay, I'm currently single and i dislike it like mad, i really would just love to find a girl, some-one to hold ect ect ect.For awhile I didnt get why i couldnt, I'm not ugly, girls tend to say im hot, cute, good lucking, fit ect ect, im straight so its not that, and im not just looking for a FWB, then i realised, that i'm scared.Trying to explain this simply, i feel scared by the idea of 'commitment' opening up to another human of the opposite sex just scares me, The thought of something eventualy possibly leading to marriage makes me shake, 'responsbility' for your partner or ect ect scared me again, Yet, i feel lonely like i need some-one in a commitment way, How Do I Over Come This? Help! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Twistedbaby420  +, writes (9 August 2009):
 It's normal to be scared and hesitant about starting a relationship with someone, you're making yourself vulnerable. It is definitely rewarding though, and you're going to miss out on so much in life if you aren't willing to let your walls down and take a chance. This isn't to say you'll never be hurt, or that you'll never hurt someone. It happens and you learn from it, life really does go on.
Being that you're 16-17, I would take things one step at a time. Marriage and family are a long ways away for you if you're smart, you don't want to rush these things. Instead, start by hanging out with a girl (or girls haha) as just friends. If you really like someone, ask them out on a date. Maybe it will develop into something, and maybe it won't. Just take things one day at a time and enjoy everything. Live in the present and don't worry so much about the future.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2009): It think it's normal for a man to be scared. Women also have the same problems but not as much as men. I don't know if you can over come this problem that quickly. You just have to learn to relax. Keep thinking you are not going to marry the person now, why being scared for no reason. Mentally, you are not ready for a long term relationship. I think the word "Commitment" is a scary word, men freak out and leave when women push them too much. If you find someone, just take things slowly. When you feel it's time for you to settle down your anxiety will disappear and you will be ready to commit.
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