A
male
age
36-40,
*nq
writes: I love my penis in every way, except that I wish that I still had a foreskin.. Unfortunately I was circumcised at a young age (4), partly because of cultural reasons and partly because I had a tight foreskin which made it difficult to retract all the way. This wasn't really an issue (still isn't, I guess) but sometimes I really wish that I hadn't been circumcised, or at least been at an age where I could have made the decision myself. I think of how there are so many uncircumcised men all over the world, and the look of a penis with a foreskin just seems so much more beautiful to me. After all that's how it was intended to look. And I feel incomplete, because that beautiful part of me was chopped away when I was too young to have any say in it. After all there were ways to stretch it out to retract all the way, it didn't have to be done away with all together. I don't know, this has just grown to be a big issue for me and I guess I'm looking for support, or maybe to hear from someone who's had similar feelings?
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male
reader, Coedybryn +, writes (14 December 2009):
As a victim of a doctor with a "circumcision cures all ills" attitude, I note the number of comments from females who claim that "It doesn't matter if baby boys are circumcised, or allow their views on aesthetic issues to cloud their judgement. Function must overule appearance, especially when it concerns a part of the body that will not be used for many years. I wonder whether their opinion would differ if a doctor had removed the inner lips of their vulva "because they get wet when urinating, and are best removed early in life".
A
male
reader, planepocket +, writes (21 April 2009):
You need to work out your feelings of betrayal and loss and you can do it on your own,in a group of other circumcised men or people dealing with loss of body parts and you could also see a therapist.Most 4 year old boys have an unretactable foreskin it normally isn't fully retractable until puberty.Foreskin restoration is possible through 1-10 years of using one of the restoration devices found online or surgery taking a skin graft from your scrotum or inside of your mouth or a combination of all three.
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A
male
reader, NightLad +, writes (2 April 2009):
Hi there,I suffered from the same procedure shortly after birth.* I’m sure my parents only did what they thought was best at the time. However, I’ve since had more than one long discussion with them about my feelings on the matter. To put it mildly, I disagree with what they decided for me. In my opinion, parents often confuse the thought of owning their child with owning that child’s body. Nobody has the right to decide to amputate a function body part (resulting in a life-long scar) for another person. Our bodies are our own, whether male or female. I believe that only the individual who will have to live with that decision should make it at an age when the law recognizes them being fit to make it, like any other elective surgery.More and more people are awakening to this realization, especially in North America where the practice has been considered “routine” for decades. (More on that in a minute.) Fortunately in recent years the rate of infant circumcision is on the decline.Many men who come to identify with this issue face feelings of violation at not being allowed to maintain a full and intact body. Many of us wonder why, in a society that has so long defended “My Body, My Choice” when pertaining to women, our choice about our bodies was completely ignored. Feelings of betrayal, confusion, pain, incompleteness and even rage are completely normal.You are absolutely correct in your deduction that amputating your foreskin to deal with “tightness” was unnecessary. Sadly, many North American doctors, even male doctors (being circumcised themselves), simply don’t have any experience in dealing with this part of the body. If they did, they would have known that the foreskin is not supposed to retract from the glans of the penis for the first few years of life. It is there for a reason. For example, during infancy it protects the still developing and tender glans from sitting in urine and feces. After baby boys are circumcised their parents are advised to keep the penis coated in Vaseline to protect the open wound and the glands of the penis. Ironic, don’t you think? Nature already thought of that!My advice is to read and research this issue. Sadly, some men who speak out about this practice still face ridicule, but don’t let that stop you from seeking support. There are many groups that exist to offer support and helpful advice to men who have had this situation forced on them.While it is true that the portions of your penis that were amputated by the circumcision procedure cannot grow back, there is hope to regain the cosmetic look of an intact penis. For example, there are various stretching techniques that you can apply to the remaining skin on the shaft of your penis in the privacy of your own home. These exercises will slowly and gently encourage permanent growth of new skin, which will eventually be able to completely cover your glans. I stared Restoring like this and within the first year I was able to cover the glands of my penis. Although I will never know what it is like to have a functional foreskin or frenulum, I do feel somewhat more ‘complete.’ Also, as many other men who undertake restoring techniques report, I’ve experienced a lasting gain in overall sensitivity. I’ll explain:As you will no doubt learn in your research (but I will mention here for the sake of others) the glans (head) of a penis was never meant to be an external organ. In its natural state, protected by the foreskin (which has many other functions, too!), it is warm, moist and the skin is a healthy rosy pink. For comparison roll down your lower lip; the flesh just inside your mouth is basically what your glans should look like. However, after circumcision the glans of the penis is forced to adapt to the outside world. To protect itself from the elements and friction of clothing rubbing against its sensitive skin the glans will build a thickened layer of skin. When the glans is protected by your restored “foreskin” these layers of skin will start to vanish. They were not meant to be there.One analogy for the loss of sensitivity though circumcision is to run your finger along the palm of your hand, and then to run it along the top of your hand. See the difference? Of course, this is a relative analogy due to the fact that everybody is different, but it is one that many men who chose to be circumcised later in life report to be apt.Circumcision started in Victorian England (1800s) as a way to curb masturbation, because it reduces sensation. England used to be positively obsessed with it, until the 1940s when medical information was released advocating leaving babies naturally intact. Almost overnight the rate of babies being mutilated dropped to less than 1%.However, in America, the medical profession was less forward. Some speculate that this was due to privatized healthcare, and with the procedure costing parents about $200 (average) most doctors were less willing kill the golden goose. In fact, it continued to be common practice to recommend circumcision to expecting parents. The excuses were many, but the main one to arise was the promise of lowering the risk of penile cancer. Of course, nobody bothered to tell expectant parents that penile cancer is an extremely rare form of melanoma that occurs in less than 1% of men over the age of 70. To use this logic it would be fair to advocate amputating baby girl’s mammary glands to prevent breast cancer!Today we hear that circumcision supposedly lowers HIV transmission. However, such studies have been met with criticism in medical circles. What the advocates don’t tell you is that the primary study to suggest this information came from Africa, from an area where the rate of HIV infection is roughly 80%. That would be like me going to China to research cancer rates, and then concluding that mostly Chinese people get cancer!In closing, you do not need to allow the way your individual human rights were violated to make you a victim. You can do something about it. Channel whatever anger or pain you feel into a positive force to speak out against this continued injustice. Educate yourself so that you may spread that information, and maybe you can help prevent other infants from being victimized.You also have the option to begin restoring techniques. Google “Foreskin Restoration” for many great resources. You may also consider joining an organization such as the National Organization of Restoring Men (http://www.norm.org/) And a great general-information article can be found here: http://mensightmagazine.com/Articles/Northrup/lovecirc.htmWhatever else, remember: you are not alone.* For the record, I have a mutually-respected restraining order from discussing religious reasons for the practice. I don’t go near it, and it stays away from me. ;P
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2009): There are some ways of creating a foreskin (or what looks like foreskin),but it takes a lot of time and dedication.I dont know a lot about it,but I have seen before and after pictures,and it looks basically the same as if you never got chopped!(My ex was interested in restoring his foreskin.) I would suggest that you go to google,and search foreskin regrowth,foreskin restoration,etc.You dont need to have any sort of surgery to do this,but like I said,it wont happen over night and you have to keep at it to get the desired results.Basically all your doing is stretching the skin daily,until eventually it covers the head of the penis,like the foreskin on an uncircumsized male.
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (2 April 2009):
I have read more than once that evidence suggests that circumcision may slightly reduce the risk of contracting HIV (the vius that causes AIDS).
I can't understand why this makes you feel complete, but obviously I've never had a penis at all so I suppose it's a "guy thing." Still, no one ever sees your penis!! (Unless you go to a nude beach, that is.)
I feel like you should be told the truth about what your options are. It's hard, but there are some things that we can't change and have no choice but to accept, or we can never move on.
I think that if you REALLY hate it, you should talk to a plastic surgeon. There are procedures to reconstruct the foreskin, and recently, there have been some advances in this.
When I was 10 I read an article about a kid who lost his entire penis, the victim of a horrible crime (miraculously, he survived but it should have killed him), and the doctors were able to reconstruct the whole penis. I'm an old lady of 29 now, so I can imagine the advances that have taken place in the medical field over the years.
I think that you're placing a lot of importance on this, and you're entitled to those feelings. Talk to a plastic surgeon or a doctor if you feel you need closure, but be very picky as there are a few good doctors out there and unfortunately many crummy ones.
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A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (1 April 2009):
To be honest, even as a grown woman I cannot look at a picture of an uncircumcised penis without giggling (no offense to those guys who have not been circumcised).
Especially in American culture, circumcised penises are just regarded as the norm. True, if the guy is hygienic then there is no "cleanliness" issue, but most women that I talk to prefer circumcised.
I do sympathize with you over wishing to have been consulted over the matter. It is a subject my ex husband and I discussed at great length regarding any boys we might have had. And he was adamant that they be circumcised, so to each his own.
The fact of the matter is that you can't get it back, you can't go back in time, and if you had to deal with a tight foreskin at this point in your life there is a distinct possibility you'd be having painful sex that might even have resulted in the tearing of the foreskin. I think your parents did what they thought would be best for you, and you just need to look at that. Your health and comfort was top priority for them, and honestly I think they chose well.
Sorry to say, but you might just have to start getting over this. If you let something irreversible drag you down, then it's going to do the same for your sexual partners, and create a whole other mess of issues.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (1 April 2009):
If it'll make you feel better then they do say circumcised men last longer in bed as it's not as sensitive.
But I think you need a man's perspective on this.
As a woman I will never understand why you all get so excited and put so much pride into something that hardly anyone gets to see.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, cutiepye +, writes (1 April 2009):
In the nicest way why!? I find circumcized penises more attractive honeslty I've only been with one person who wasn't but I dnt fantasize bout that guy!! To each its own all I can say is we all have things about our body we dnt like that's life learn to be happy with yourself its who you are...and if its not broken babe why try to fix it!!
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