A
female
age
41-50,
*eBeTonya
writes:I met this guy off of a dating website (strike 1 on me) in February of this year. We went on a date, hit it off, talked for a couple of days and then I didnt hear from him again for about a week. He informed me that his exgirlfriend of 9 months had called him and he didnt realize he still had feelings for her. So we stopped talking. About 2 weeks later he calls me again and asked if we could go out just as friends. I said yes. (strike 2 on me) Well, we kissed that night and then again, I didnt hear from him. (strike 3 on me). So I didnt worry about it. Several months later, I got back on the same dating website. I noticed he was looking at my profile but I never messaged him. He finally did one day asking if I would please give him another chance. For some asinine reason, I said yes (strike 4 on me). My dilemma.. We've now been dating for 3 months. He's 26 and I'm 28. Not much of an age difference right.. well, when it comes to lifestyle there is. I'm a bit reserved and I have come to find out he's a bit of a child. From eating tablespoons of peanut butter to, gummie bears, tuna and fruit to eating cereal out of a pot because he doesnt wash his dishes.. He stays up until 5 am playing his xbox and leaves me to sleep by myself. He'll stay up with his friends, call, text them constantly but rarely calls or texts me. He'll stay up all night with them, but when Im over there he goes to bed early. We decided two days ago to "take some time apart".. I've barely heard from him. Im trying to muster up enough strength to not care and just live my life but I cant help but feel aggravated because of his childish antics. Should I wait it out to see if he matures, or should I just end it?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (16 December 2009):
 Maybe you think if he grows up a little, he'll be really appealing? Don't fall for it!
You're going to be treated the way you allow yourself to b treated. He sounds like an overgrown teenager, from your description, and maybe he's great fun to be with if you can manage to overlook the flaws. The thing is, the flaws will only be magnified if you stay with him, so be sure you can live with them.
You could say 'tag me back when you're no longer a teenager' and walk away with your dignity intact, and your self-esteem healthy.... honestly, there are grown men out there. Why settle for teenager? I'm trying to imagine introducing him to your friends and having to explain his behavior. It wouldn't work for me, and it sounds like it's not going to work for you.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, MeBeTonya +, writes (16 December 2009):
MeBeTonya is verified as being by the original poster of the question Update. The friend that was staying at his house has went home today. He was an out of town friend who came to stay for the week. NOW, he texts me and wants to come over and spend the night.. blah blah blah.. Almost everything about me says walk away.. But something keeps me holding on.. What the hell is it?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2009): End it, hes not that into you. If he cant make an effort for you in the first instance, theres no chance he will improve. And how many years are you willing to wait for him to mature!! Hes 26 not 16. If hes not grown up now he never will be.
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A
female
reader, kissmenow  +, writes (14 December 2009):
never date younger men! they are so immature! im 30... and have learned this the hard way- through experience. you have only been dating for 3 months.... if you dont like him now- it wont get better. cut your losses and start dating older, more mature men, that act respectably and know what they want in life. good luck.
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