A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been in a long distance relationship with my ex about a year and half from the beginning. We were best friends and soul mates that I had a no doubt I would end up with her until death do us apart.I'm a college student, so I only could visit her during the breaks. I was supposed to transfer to another school nearby where she lives and live with her, but due to financial difficulties and my current school's fame, my parents forced me not to transfer. She complained about not being with her, and I wasn't romantic and acted like just a friend. Then she started giving me less care, and we fought over it, and I broke up with her.The first breakup didn't last longer than a week, and I was happy to take her back. But after a week after makeup, she broke up with me without giving me a reason. I was all mad first, then I got depressed. I started calling her crying, then I asked her to come back.Now she does not respond to my phone call. I texted her how much I love her, and I wish I could take her back, but she simply text me back, "no, I'm sorry. It's over now," "no I need time," "no, you'll tear my heart apart."I was so depressed, and I kept texting her that I can quit school now and come visit you. Then she responded:"if you really love me, then you will let me go, let me be free to live my own life. please."I still text her back that I love her, but she hasn't text me back since then.I looked it up on internet searching for "how to take my ex back," and I realized that I should have been in no contact with her and don't act so needy, but I am too late. I hope my ex wouldn't hate me because of this.As mentioned, we were best friends as soul mates, and we have a lot of good memories together. All I do is crying in my room, I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't go to school, I can't do anything without her. I was so motivated to pursue the success for my future family with her, but now I lose my life long dream.I know she loved me a lot, but does she stil love me? I was her first boyfriend, and she was my first serious girlfriend as well. I can't bear losing her. I don't know what I am going to do without her. I don't text her or try to call her anymore, just to follow no contact method, but it is killing me. Do you think I still have a chance? Spring break will be held in next month, and I want to see her and say I love her. Please give me any advice. I need your help desperately please.
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best friend, broke up, depressed, last longer, long distance, my ex, soul mates, soulmate, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2009): Dear lovesalias,I am the writer who asked this question. Everything what you said was true, but as I'm love sick and love blind, I didn't want to admit it. So I text her:"we need to talk as best friends and soul mates like we used to be and always will be. I'll not be emotional, cry, beg, or make you sad. I respect your decision and all. If you think I'm your true soul mate and still care for me, please call me when you are ready. If you need time and need space alone, it doesn't have to be now but I will wait for you."But she hasn't even text me back. I am a dork who only studys at school all by myself, so i don't really have a friend to talk over or just hang out with. So, I call my mom from Korea, and I cried on the phone for 30 mins. How pathetic is that? But after talking with her, I feel a lot better now. I'm still loved one and valued one for someone (even though it is my mom), and she told me that "if it is meant to be, it is meant to be, but if it is not, you gotta let it go." From now on, I will do my best to get strength again, and move on.But I am still hurt that she changed so rapidly as a different person, and she doesn't even want to talk to me or regard me as a friend (we were best friends ever, at least I believed in her).I am deeply hurt, I don't know if I will ever trust someone or be in love with someone. And yet, I'm learning a valueable lesson to become a true adult.I thank you for the advice. I really do. Thank you.- H.P
A
female
reader, lovesalias +, writes (20 February 2009):
 I think that it is good that you do not contact her. She has said that she would like to be free. You are both very young and the best thing you can do is move on with your life. You don't have to get into another relationship but you do have to live your life. If you hope to ever have a chance with her again you still need to keep yourself together and stay focused on your dreams. Try not to be alone because that is when it get really difficult with out her. IF things are meant to be they will be. One last word...God never shuts one door without opening another. There are bigger and better things that await you so focus on you and get your mind right. This too shall pass. Just pretend that you are in an area that gets no reception and so you can't call her. Sometimes it helps to write out your feeling and read it. This site actually helped me get back on track. I started helping other people with suggestions and reading their stories made me realize that life goes on and is too short to be upset of what if's and made me see the right now. Good Luck I hope this helps. I am sure you are a smart talented handsome young man that any woman would be lucky to have. You need to have this alone time to truly experience life now. Make Plans with friends plan a vacation getaway for spring break and start a new!!!
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