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male
,
anonymous
writes: Hi, I really really really need help. I've been kinda stupid. I'm 18 and I'm going (or was) going out with a girl who's 14. see my previous question (http://www.dearcupid.org/question/broke-up-with-my-gf-of-3-yearsnow.html) Since that (well about a month later) her mum found out we were sending really sexy texts to each other. She told my GF that she had our texts monitiored and has got the police involved (which was a lie). To cut a long story short I asked my church pastor for advice he went to the next level up (his pator) and they decided to get the police involved! What I wanna know is, is talking about sex between a 14yo girl and an 18yo wrong when they are in a relationship and deeply in love? I know most of you will say that I am just after sex but I'm not; I'm not that interested in sex at all. I love her and want to do her right. Can the police or her mum stop us having a relationship in the long run? I really love her. Please help
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male
reader, maxsteel86  +, writes (12 June 2006):
 If you really love her, then you'll wait till she's 16. Even if your girlfriend consents, you'll still be charged with statutory rape (in the worst case)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2006): Once the police is involved there is no way they'll back away! I was in the same situation when I was 14 and the only thing that stopped them from interfering in our relationship was when my boyfriend of 19 at the time had his parents go over and talk to my parents. Once that happend, my mother had a change of heart because she saw what nice people they really were and she didnt want to hurt them by having their son locked up, plus my father knew his dad. My mom was and felt strongly about putting him in jail too, believe me!!! Well, im now in my 20's and we live together. We kept on with the relationship. My parents knew how serious this was and that we were willing to do anything to stay together. She knew that even if she brought the police in this, that we were going to run away together or continue to see eachother secretly. And she knew that it was impossible to keep me locked up in the house just so that she could be reassured that i wasnt seeing him. So they didnt want me to run away, and they didnt want to keep me locked up either. So they let me be with him. I know what some people are thinking as you're readin this, i've hered it all!
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A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (11 June 2006):
 Yes, a friend of mine is sort of in the same situation, but he is older.Speaking to him, I can see that he really is in love with her and would marry her tomorrow if he could.The police are involved already after her parents found out about him.He is facing jail, although all he has done is fell in love, no sex or anything, just love.It is probably better for you to just ease off and wait until she is 16, then I am sure you will both find a way to contact each other and hopefully be together.Let me know how things develop for you, if you wanna chat about anything, just email me.
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A
female
reader, Smiler +, writes (11 June 2006):
 Hey there
Well i'm afraid your not gonna wanna hear this babe but yeah they can actually get involved or her parents could indeed get an judement where you are not allowed within 10 feet of her or you could get charged with harrassment by her parents really alsorts could happen as she is under age babe and you are an adult this is frowned upon by autoritiessfor a very good reason she is very young and unable to commit to such as serious relationship, you on the other hand are a consenting adult and really should be with someone your own age babe.. her parents are just trying to protect their daughter as any parent does so i can't honestly see them backing down here babe they will probably insist she changes mobile numbers now and have your number blocked from her cell then you won't be able to contact her at all... so i would strongly recommend that you try to move onwards with your life and let this girl do the same because otherwise i fear this will all end in tears...
I hope my advice was able to help you out with your situation sweetie and good luck with this... if you ever need a friend or a chat or just more advice don't hesitate to email me sweetie, I would love to hear from you again and know how you got on... Remember i'm always here for you anytime ok
You Take Care Sweetie X
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2006): i really think that u should look for a girl around your own age people will be calling u this that and the other if u dont u may care for her but u can stay as freinds it is better to be safe than sorry
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